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♡ Violet ♡, 20 y.o.
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Date: October 23, 2022
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Maybe they met her at a party, and don't have her contact info.
Maybe they don't want to face the embarrassment of having given their items to a girl that has absolutely zero interest in them.
Many reasons.
M,38 here.
If this guy….who is 30, hasn’t learnt to look after himself by now, and now is ok with fights with his SO now being part of that, he probably won’t.
Like I never get this. The boy doesn’t wanna clean, but now has an argument and still doesn’t wanna clean. Grow up bro.
Not really they both can carry the gene.
Make it up to him, you mean your cat? The normal way but him treats, play with him and maybe a can of tuna.
Tell the dude to never call you again. You deserve better then someone who treats animals poorly.
I learned something new. Thanks.
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Tbh, I feel like managing a business with someone who you built a previous life with, who can’t have kids, who now over time will (to some degree or another) hear about your kid and wife and something she wanted with you… over time even if she has zero feelings left for you it’ll cause a lot of jealously. I can’t see this not leading to a lot of drama for everyone involved.
I say this with no judgement. And with the knowledge that getting out of a business might not be immediate and might come with a high cost. You know all the details I don’t and it’s 100% your life.
Anyway idk if the financial benefit outweighs the relational and mental stress cost vs getting out at an opportune time rather than when one of you just can’t stand the drama.
This is kinda how I feel about it, marriage just makes things permanent and if he wants to be with me why is a ring getting in the way?
“How dirty is the counter when she wakes up” was my first thought lol
Oh, don’t you know? Having feelings and opinions = reserved for men. Women are supposed to be meek housewives who dedicate all their time to worshipping every single decision a man has ever made, or else they’re barely women at all /s
Its only been 2 weeks and he is already cheating on his potential bride with you?.
I dont think you are the 1st woman he has been doing and saying this to.
Im taking a lot of time off from things to get over what i went through, that’s why i even posted because i felt old habits coming up from when i was in high school. Unfortunately i kinda got what i wanted back then and i know in this situation i shouldnt get what i want and thats why i wanted advice on how to stop liking someone that’s inappropriate to like :/
Guys are guilty of pulling the same shit too when they have a female best friend crossing and blurring lines. It sucks no matter who’s doing it.
Hmmmm. If it were me … I’d be down !!! But also. My bf’s comfort is more important to me. I love him enough to kick my dog out of the bed ( it’s for everyone’s benefit really ) but today when he said my bed wasn’t comfortable…
I’m already making moves to fix that .
If he wanted to do a threesome with a male… oh yay. But I’d only want it if he wanted it.
I’d be uninterested in anything that he wasn’t confident in.
That’s just me. I’m a devoted kinda person. And it’s easy for me.
Maybe you and your gf are having growing pains .
And the growth is apart.
fight over the smallest of things, get riled up over each others perception of events of a situation, and bring up how we have separately wronged each other all the time.
I thought this was reason enough, already. And then you added he sexism, control and him berating you.
You're nor being too harsh or unforgiving. Who wants to live! this way??
Break up with him. Your feelings are completely valid and they deserve respect. He is not the guy for you.
The right guy will not behave in this way.
You are only dating. Dating means looking for the right person. If they are not the right person the only thing to do is end it and move on. You don’t need to tell him why. Just say you have realised that you are not compatible. Delete and block him on all SM and move on.
As for actually addressing this issue, I would make a couple suggestions:
Be willing (set a timer if you have to) to wait your husband out. Obviously, I'm not advocating for letting your child scream for two hours while you two stare at each other in silence. Rouse him using unconventional means, if necessary. If he's claiming that he can't wake up, can't get up, etc., offer to throw an ice pack on his back (or wherever). Or whatever it takes – you know him better. This one you would need to talk about beforehand, though. If the problem is not actually sleeping/waking, as we both suspect, then the problem is simply his willingness to help. Unfortunately, that's a much more difficult problem to address. Also unfortunately, drastic reform along these lines typically takes drastic action. Like, threatening to leave, separation, requesting therapy/counseling, etc.
Often, however, by the time “I'm willing to leave you over this” comes around, they start sleeping through the night, or the problem resolves itself somehow. Problem is, your resentment might not go away from this period of time, even if he forgets all about it. That resentment can be a real problem, so be wary of it.
she's not dying
tell her
idk random things..
1- There is a special occasion coming soon.. i told him the importance of exchanging gifts in this occasion.. doesn’t matter the price.. or whats the gift is.. he said i will see.. suddenly he says i dont have enough money i bough pc set for 1.5k€.. I got hurt and confused? he didnt gift anything, or any nice gesture
2- I sent him a poem and a song 3 weeks ago he never reacted to them.. I asked him today what happened why he didnt react to them.. he said i dont know didnt pay attention to them and didnt listen to the song.. i got hurt
idk maybe im the problem:D
You would be crazy to go along with this plan. If he can't pay his credit card he won't pay the car payment either. Then you will be stuck paying for a car you didn't want that is half in his name. BTW, before you get a new car, several people have already had their ass in it, from the guy who drove it off the assembly line, the truck driver who delivers it to the dealership, the sales person, the mechanic who inspected it, the guy who cleaned it and several others.
I just read all your comments and I can’t imagine treating my kids like you do. Your daughter doesn’t NEED to help anyone out. Not even you. Children are not responsible for their parents or any extended family. You have your priorities so screwed up I don’t even know how to explain how bad they are when it comes to your parenting. I am glad your daughter got out of your house and isn’t supporting you anymore. Your gravy train has left the building. Get over it and start acting like an adult.
I don't know her interests, but when I did this for my wife I got fresh fish, beer she liked, and cooked her dinner.
I've been where your partner is. You need to get him on board with your treatment. Not with you or your disorder. He doesn't see it getting better and you're not sketching a great image for the future.
I'm decently educated in mental health and meds and I encouraged my partner taking them if he needed them. Only for him not to get out of bed, sleep for 12 hours a day. And all he did was say: “yeah, those are side effects.”
I was pissed and pushy af. It was only after he actually explained me his treatment plan and I actually got a say in it, that we improved.
It was nice to actually be part of his treatment plan and it helped him a lot to have someone that could help him monitor.
It really helped just being able to say: “look we have a vacation, could your dosage increase wait a week? Would love a partner, not a zombie.” It was a lot nicer than being confronted with a zombie partner who would have to do things, while he was drowsy to the point of him being a risk to himself.
People expect the partner of a mentally ill person to be supportive, fact is that as a partner you're also drowning in worry 50% of the time and trying to solve problems you can't even begin to understand.
Same here. I love the news, husband is sick of the news. So I read it and he doesn’t. He does his research around election time but the rest of the time he doesn’t want to hear it
She's not his friend anymore, she's his affair partner. Feelings follow actions and there is no path forward with them still communicating, he needs to go no contact immediately, insist on it and be willing to take action.
Not always. It is worth telling the truth now especially since he wanted you to stay quiet while you were attending marriage counseling. He did that to avoid a bollocking from his parents. Odds are they'll end up being the ones looking after your eldest during his custody time. And you need to go for 50-50 custody so that you get some time to yourself.
I’m really torn on this. Normally I would say that you should just go take care of yourself, especially with your fiancé‘s questionable job history. And obviously he should be going with you. I just get the feeling that this “finance“ job that he has is sales-based, and it takes a very special character indeed to make it in that kind of career field. Most of them burn out within a year.
But I’m not sure that’s the right decision in this case. So now I think you don’t need to break up with him — but I would say that both of you should go and try these jobs and re-evaluate in six months. By then he may have quit his job again, and you may be having a great time and he may want to come be with you. It is HIGHLY unlikely that both of you will be doing fantastically in six months.
The one thing that makes me question that idea at all is that quite frankly having watched a lot of my friends work in the restaurant industry for a very long time, I just have a feeling that this GM position is going to suck. And that feeling is so strong in my gut, that I’m not sure it’s even worth going to try it. It’s either going to suck and not work out, or the people just will not be the same as the kind of people you work with now, (as in, they will suck) or they’re never actually going to get around to hiring you.
I have a friend who was strung along like that for almost 6 months (and this was a nationally known very profitable chain of several restaurants under one umbrella that she was really excited to start a management track position with) and turned down numerous opportunities in order to work with this company, and they ended up screwing up her paycheck, repeatedly screwing up her schedule, and completely fucking up her training.
She was supposed to be training, but instead they had her working. In case anyone is wondering “what’s wrong with that?“ — she was not supposed to be there to be the labor to make things happen. She was supposed to be working ALONGSIDE the labor. She didn’t have time to learn anything at all! When she went to the higher-ups about this, they agreed this was unacceptable and they said they were going to move her. They never found anywhere to move properly. There were a lot of meetings and going back-and-forth, begging her to stay blah blah blah it was just a mess. And I don’t know why but to me, this “opportunity” smells exactly like that.
That’s why I think the best idea is for you both to pursue your opportunities separately while maintaining a long-distance relationship! That way, if either of you bombs, you’ve got somewhere to go. As I said before, it is highly unlikely, you will both succeed. I’m not trying to be Debbie downer, but it’s real.
And honestly, you don’t need to postpone the wedding if you don’t want to. I have another friend who is long-distance with her fiancé right now. He’s coming to get married over memorial day weekend and spending a week with her. Until the end of 2023 they will be together one week out of each month or so while he spends time selling his house, finishing his job and retiring, and getting his youngest through high school and off to college. They’re getting married now so that they can be on his health insurance, which is excellent, and he will carry with him into retirement. I mean obviously you can postpone the wedding if you want, I’m just saying there are ways to keep the wedding date while still pursuing your separate opportunities.
I just would definitely not place all my eggs in your job’s basket. Sorry, not with as flaky as they’ve been with you so far.