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♥abigail♥, 20 y.o.
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Date: October 4, 2022
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This is grooming, and illegal. Go to the police and cut off all contact with him.
So you didn't mind all talking about her as if she were a piece of meat before she was your girlfriend?
I am unsure if she hates them! We do not live! together but she seems to not like them based on the way she talks about them. She does not have to do anything I would just hope that she’s open to loving them since I care so much about them. I was sitting on the floor and they came into the FaceTime and a conversation was brought up about them 🙂 I appreciate your perspective thank you!
She finished twice before you started, WTF did she have sex with someone before you or was she using toys?
While that may be true to a certain extent (they might get him things they could expect to see him using) it's still pretty insulting to his wife. For her to ask him repeatedly what he wants and put so much effort into finding something only to have him not say a word about his preferences is kind of a shit thing to do. It smacks of passive aggressiveness. If I were her I wouldn't even bother getting him anything because he doesn't seem like he gives a shit anyway. Or hes just a sadistic asshole and likes to see her frustration and disappointment when he shits all over the gift she gave him.
We discussed prior to dating and at that point she said she wouldn't date me if she wasn't sure she wanted to spend her life with me. In my mind I took that at face value that she would eventually choose us first. Probably my mistake.
First, please let me say I am so sorry for your loss, and the fact that you seem to have gotten NO care or compassion from your life mate. I am sending you virtual hugs ans strength.
You need to accept the fact that you are married to a very selfish and inconsiderate person. This is not going to change. In all actuality, therapy probably only helped to give him more tools to manipulate arguments so that he gets his way. That is his main concern, and the only thing he really loves. Getting his way. You are just an obstacle, without any feelings, needs or anything of value. I am sorry if this sounds harsh, but the sooner you come to terms with this, the sooner you can try and live! a life where you can be happy.
Make a plan, and get away from him.
Yep, seen it many times by now. It is manipulation and it is heart warming when they were just after permission to cheat with somebody and blows in their faces. The husband was put in a horrible position and I am happy he may get a better partner.
You could file a report. I would explain the situation. I would also involve the German police because from what I remember (during my time at Graf) was that they don't mess around.
Depends if you see yourself with someone who has already demonstrated that she can emotionally cheat
maybe, just maaaaybe you should talk it to him instead of the internet; I mean, I follow porn accs that pop up from time to time, my bf doesn't care so I just leave them be.
look, tbh, trying to compete with internet porn is just a lost battle from the start, but if that is too much of an issue for you, either talk to him to unfollow those accs or leave him
Tell her you are going naked swimming with a bunch of female friends and see how she reacts. If she doesn’t like it, tell her you won’t do it if she doesn’t either.
Same could be said about women, yet they can abort can't they?
Take the lead, move on and find someone without the games. You deserve it
Something you seem to know very little about
You and your partner decide what is allowed in your relationship. For a lot of people, masturbating or watching porn can be dealbreakers, subscribing to Of or following Instagram models can also be dealbreakers.
If your boyfriend is otherwise a good one, I'd sit him down and tell him how his social media habits affect your self esteem and communicate it as a deal breaker. Maybe you guys can come to a solution that works for you. You are completely valid in feeling this way and you shouldn't feel like you need to be okay with this. I'd chuck it up to incompatibility, neither of you are unreasonable, you just have different expectations of each other and your relationship.
So you've basically done a version of hyphenation anyway just to avoid actual hyphenation, this is called a Portmanteau, and rather than being new its actually a kind of old thing thats been around a long time.
If you look at other cultures its not uncommon or you'll also see even stranger versions, like in places like Iceland where there's both paternal and maternal naming, so a sons surname might be Helmondsson (Son of Helmond) and the daughters surname could be Helmondssdotter, so naming structure doesn't necessarily follow common “western” structures.
Its just that you're both going to have to change your names in order for her to have the same name.
For an older family member, they probably see this as abandoning the family name, and it may look indecisive, in that rather being able to make one or two simple choices, as in select either family or hyphenate, you're going a more complicated way that not only separates the child from both family names but now also makes you both ditch the family names as well.
Names, especially family names meant something to the older generation, a link to our past, those links become more important as you get older, so thats probably where the anger is coming from.
But I guess life isn't about easy choices, and other people can't make choices for us, so good luck to you how ever it plays out.
Also rich if you to assume I’ve JUST turned 18? Seems a little personal (your whole reply) but you do you boo
If they were sharing bills that means sharing finances to some extent. Honestly he seems like either a troll or like he’s changing his story because he doesn’t like the responses he’s getting.
She isn't cis and infertile. She's trans. Conflating the two means literally nothing. A lot of straight men and lesbian women don't want to and wouldn't consent to having intercourse or sexual contact with a transwoman. They know that. Hiding it is lying by omission as the assumption was clearly that she is cis whereas really she is passing. This was a manipulation. You can't just wipe out all wrongdoings by a human based on the fact that they are trans. It's not some catch-all for bad behaviour.
Geez talk about being your own worst enemy. His ego is inflated to the point of delusion. I think you getting out of this now will be the best thing for you. He is the type who will struggle his whole working life because he always views himself as right and if someone disagrees he will be an asshole about it.
I told her I would make a better effort of waking up earlier to hangout in the mornings but she kept saying she deserves better
To be honest, I think you're the one who deserves better.
Relationships that focus on month anniversaries are exhausting…. Someone who pays that much attention to those details, will pay attention to ALL the little details. It will drain you.
Also, the two of you have full schedules already. Obviously you need to fit each-other in when you can. But at times there needs to be respect, understanding, and forgiveness on the matter.
At the end of the day, there is only so much you can put into your relationship.
And if you're trying your best and that is not good enough under your circumstances, then she will never be happy… that point, you're better off finding someone more lowkey and in more tune with you on a deeper level.
The constant accusations alone would be a deal-breaker for me.
Remember:
This relationship has been emotionally draining for me, bleeding into my physical state too, making me tired and depressed some days
Relationships are suppose to add to your life, not take away.
I’ve said this to him. I told him if he cares about me and really loves me he should be fine with me saying no and he shouldn’t press the matter. We also tried to compromise but he always wanted more than what I was willing to do, which drove me mental.
I get what you're saying. So I'll elaborate.
We had a lot of fun at parties. They were typically incredibly socially outgoing and willing to improvise. This was not the reason I chose to end those relationships. The reason was how willing these people were to enable my self-destructive tendencies. Which were not healthy at the time. So I was at fault myself.
Thank you for saying what you said. I will genuinely never refer to an ex as “a lot if fun till they weren't”.
Yeah, anyone that has done mdma knows that you dont just do it with someone who wants to fuck you and expect to stay faithful. Its called lovedrug for a reason, if she did it or not she took a chance and at the very least is very naive and impulsive
I agree with most of what you have said. However I tend to think that she is still young and doesn't know what she really wants, I kinda feel the same way. She's an introvert and she is very shy, she reads a lot and is very smart, which makes it naked for me to believe that she is the kind of girl that talks to multiple other guys. Also we haven't oficially called it a relationship (probably should've said that in the post).
The point is, I care about her a lot, and I am willing to wait for her to make up her mind.
Soon she will have some exams and I just wanted to wish her luck, nothing more than that, because I still want to give her the space she needs right now. Would it be wrong to do so?
Also I appreciate the response!
She wants a knight in shining armor. With that mouth, she ain't no princess, that's for sure!
Take the divorce and get rid of that harpy from hell.
She wants a knight in shining armor. With that mouth, she ain't no princess, that's for sure!
Take the divorce and get rid of that harpy from hell.
The way I view it is instead of helping someone real and nonfictional, we are jerking off someone's ego, who doesn't need any help, because we read their story, believed them and empathized with them.
First thing is that you a good person. To have that much love for a child that is not yours is commendable. To open up your home to a person who is broken with baggage is also commendable. Just know that he may not ever treat you like the way you want to be treated. It sounds like if you already forgiven him. Your best bet is to never complain about it and never let family and friends know. There will be many many hiccups along the way. I just hope it never gets to the point where he gets violent with you.
You can get married without having a wedding.
I'm very similar to you and lived with my partner for years before eventually getting married.
I still don't like the idea of government being a part of people's romantic relationships, even though I understand the reasons that they are. But reality reared its ugly head, I developed health problems, and we needed to be sure that he has the legal rights to make health decisions for me, etc. I also lost the ability to work and needed health insurance (yay for tying medical care to employment–thanks, USA).
Anyway, I find the idea of a wedding to be extremely stressful and undesirable. We haven't had one, but we are married.