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?❤️ Vanessa ❤️?, 20 y.o.
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Date: October 16, 2022
That lifestyle she wants unfortunately likely includes fucking other people. When she told you she has to find herself. That means she is finding herself single and alone.
He needs to leave her alone because he is not what she needs not the other way around
Hi,
Mother of 6, and former professional matchmaker here. With an unpopular opinion.
This woman has given you your legacy in that child.
You are focusing on the wrong thing here. By far, the most superior life that you can give your child is in a home with both parents. Single parents by far produce the same thing in their children's lives – single parents, sometimes with multiple children to multiple different mother's/father's. Making your wife a single parent will have an impact, and not a good one, for generations to come.
Longevity in a relationship is, believe it or not, not based on love. That part can come or go at different seasons in both your lives, and that will be true for any woman you may get together with.
However, you committed yourself to the woman who bore a child for you. You should, by rights, as a man, be focused on how to protect and provide for these two. But you're focused on how trapped you feel? What are you not free to do? Go whor*ng around? Spend/waste time playing video games, watching sports?
Whatever it is, it's not more important than your child. You decided that the moment you became a parent, and yes, I refer to either the intentional sx or the unprotected sx you had. That's when you decided to become a parent. And, at that point, your life priorities changed to include the child, and her mother. Thinking of the long game is what is needed here, and you are responsible for the outcomes of not just yourself, but for 3 people.
You need to think about the bigger picture here, and stop only considering your short term happiness.
He is unwell
Thank you for your comment, it means so much to me.
I'm not saying otherwise
Omg please have more respect for yourself than this and walk away for good. He is using you. You're doing everything you can to help him, and he's treating you like garbage. Do not give him another dime. This dude will make you ruin your credit, drain your bank account, and keep you in tears. There is someone else out there that is actually worth the effort you're putting into a relationship, someone that will appreciate you and treat you how you treat them. There's no reason to give him anymore chances, you know he's not going to change. Don't you think you deserve better? Yea, you love him, but that doesn't mean you have to let him walk all over you, he is NOT worth it.
Not this again get a life
We don’t know if they used protection and it failed (unfortunately ad I believe this is an important info for us to have).
If they didn’t use any kind of protection and he finished inside her, I agree with you. If they used protection and this happened I unfortunately have to disagree, because protection can fail and the only “truly” safe way is not having sex (and I don’t feel the discussion should be about celibacy).
Anyway, after it happened, she chose to keep it, so, it kind of is on her (not that I agree with the way the guy is doing things), but once you (me or anyone else) chooses something against the other person’s will, we have to be ready to step up and do it on our own.
Obviously you should pay; I'm surprised that people would suggest otherwise. I'm confused, though: where were you driving home from when the tire burst? The airport, or your out-of-town trip? If you took the car on your trip, and your friend didn't know about it, that might change some people's answers.
Do not forgive him or ever enter into a relationship with this person again. Holding his life hostage like this so you don't leave after her CHEATED on you is textbook emotional abuse.
He needs help but you do not have to be apart of that process.
It was grossly inappropriate of him to do this. He needs to reflect on his own actions and stop blaming everyone else for his shortcomings. Remember that before he did this he blamed you for his cheating. This is all part of the same abusive behaviour. Don't fall for it or let anyone else pressure you into entertaining his bs again. Wish him well and remove yourself gracefully.
Good you deserve better girl. Also Pakistani. My sister had an arranged marriage similar to yours she’s been married 15 years four kids and they are happily married.
AND SHE'S TRYING TO HAVE ANOTHER CHILD WITH HIM!
I'm just glad someone else sees the insanity going on here.
How do you feel about anal on him?
If I initiate to bring dinner at her place with her kid around, would that be being pushy? I was just thinking I don’t want her to carve out time specifically for me given that her schedule is super packed already.
thats not even the question lool
Rejection is across the board. If you fear Rejection dating is the worst. At least in modern day you can be sought out by others with compatible sexual preferences.
I bet it felt like a slap in the face to your mom to hear that after everything she’s done. Is he being treated for his depression?
Will it be strange to hv 2 dances? Bio dad first, coz he was pushed out by your Mom. Then do a second dance with step dad. They both matter to you. These days, ppl are most understanding.
These are the same people who fawn over the comic where the dad is like, “hey buddy, I brought you some pie from the dinner party downstairs so you don't need to say hi to anyone and can just stay in your room and play videogames”
Hmm. Idk anything about your situation but, with the text you saw and all, could he be dealing? Without further info that's all I got.
you should walk away
there is no such thing as pre cheating
that is right up there with the whole how dare you have not been a virgin when we met??
neither makes any sense
I think that is the thing I am leaning on, I heard it in her voice, I know what it's like to keep it in. Thats the thing I am really leaning on.
I mean, I definitely would have preferred to look my best and having my eye looking like a plum did me no favors in terms of meeting that goal
The advice you need depends on what your goal is, so what is your goal?
What was the context of how he told you that?
What do you think about your weight gain?
Your gf is an alcoholic. Needs help
Exactly. This is his warning. A year from now if he sticks around he can’t blame her for simping.
Don’t visit. Stay away. Do what is good for YOUR mental health, not hers.
lmao to be 21 and, no offense, this dumb again
i don't even need to know whether the kid is a disaster. the fact your bf lied to you for three months about something this big is elevator-door-spilling-blood red flag. dump him. move on.
trust me when i say there are plenty of other fish in the sea.
And that's not too much to ask for occasionally.