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Date: October 23, 2022
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Eesh, I guess you're right. I recently moved from a small town to a small city and these are pretty much all the people I know here, my all time friends online an hour away and our schedules don't always work so I feel pretty lonely, but it is true that they stress me kinda often for reasons similar to this. I usually don't care but being ok with potentially ruining someone's life just because is where I draw the line, thanks for the advice, clearly I need a third party's perspective
I’ve read a lot of good advice here already, and I’ve read some of your comments too.
One thing that I’ve had a really very hot time accepting: we can’t make anyone do or say anything. We can’t make them understand, and we certainly can’t make them think the same way we do.
I get that you love this person, and you just know that if this one thing changed, it would be okay. I’m really sorry, but it sounds like this guy is full on incompetent and I don’t think that will change. He’s not getting it- can you imagine him having to take care of children, or you if you were sick of injured? If he can’t remember to take the trash out and needs to be nagged for his only other chore, he’s not going to be a good partner in the long term.
He could just be worn out or even facing a bout of depression. Give him his space, maybe do a nice gesture (chocolates, dinner, flowers, something you know he likes) for him without much interaction, expectation of a conversation, or change in behaviour. It might help to pick his mood up a bit or just let him know your there without being in his face.
Good luck! I hope it's nothing to be worried about.
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Cancel the lease, there is absolutely nothing worse than your living space being invaded by bad energy like that, you’ll hate every second of it.
Then you really and truly fucked up. You demolished any chance you had by overreacting to something that wasn't even a deal breaker. You've made it clear that you'll fly off the handle and resort to immediately fighting dirty when things don't go your way. No sane woman would ever trust you again after that.
Sorry, but reflect on this during your next relationship, because this one is done. Try to become a better person for the next one.
But there’s still the issue of her lying about it in the first place, which confuses me.
If this was the relationship I found myself in, I would make that relatively clear to any potential partners, and I definitely wouldn’t cut off all contact when somebody else brought it up.
You should ask her why she felt the need to lie, because in my experience, people rarely lie about only one thing.
Yeah you ruined it, I would never be with someone who didn’t trust me AND tried to trick me because they didn’t trust me.
Your insecurity is the root of the issue here.