Many great alternative ideas as to why this all may be happening. I’ll add my own.
Speaking for my mom, she has training as a therapist. I’ve hear her do telehealth and she really sounds amazing at what she does, regardless of what was said on the other line my mom is always ready with a positive outlook and logical steps but if needed she provides a shoulder. However with her kids . It’s almost impossible, she gets so emotional and illogical and can’t listen for crap. It’s like the whole “mom” super love thing just … changes them can’t see passed their baby. I’m 29 for example and still sometimes she will still try and “protect me” from things she THINKS will hurt me.
She realized what while adults understand the lessons you can learn from failure. It’s a tougher lesson as a child and children can switch focuses quickly and develop interests that give them joy. She maybe trying to protect him in a motherly way without realizing it goes against what she knows logically as a sport. Maybe she’s worried he may become disinterested if it’s too hot. He might lose the love of something all of you share.
Playing at her level might make her feel bad in a motherly way. She might not even realize it. Even if she does she might be denying it due to feeling deep down that her fears may also disrupt his growth in the game.
Maybe try to find moves that lead towards him finding a way to win. Set it in a way that it’s like after training with his mom he’s better now. Y’all aren’t training a grand master. You’re having fun with your child and sharing a hobby.
So, and this could be wrong, based on what you’ve said it seems that you might remain unattached from others in an emotional sense due to the childhood events listed above. And while it sounds like you can talk about those events in your childhood you haven’t worked through them properly. I would honestly recommend therapy of some kind, since those events could be holding you back from emotionally connecting and caring about others.
Of course I could also be off base, but I do hope this gets better because that will strain a relationship and cause problems in the future.
>>he says I should be willing to give up stuff for a relationship and I agree, I
You shouldn't agree, though! That's a bonkers attitude. You may want the just leave her bro comments to be kept to a minimum, but perhaps that is because you don't want to face reality? You already spend a ton of time with her to the exclusion of other pursuits, including a gym habit that is good for you. Youknow how much my partner & I give up for our relationship? Nothing. He does what he wants and needs, I do what I want and need, and then we meet in the gaps. And are happy.
Just do it, it works. You don’t have to hit them that nude, they are sensitive. He will cry about it not being the same. But it is. I just say if you don’t want this to happen again all you have to do is not fuck with me
Oh, for sure. Whenever you get blackout drunk, anything goes! /s
Then I guess that’s a haram on this part ?
Many great alternative ideas as to why this all may be happening. I’ll add my own.
Speaking for my mom, she has training as a therapist. I’ve hear her do telehealth and she really sounds amazing at what she does, regardless of what was said on the other line my mom is always ready with a positive outlook and logical steps but if needed she provides a shoulder. However with her kids . It’s almost impossible, she gets so emotional and illogical and can’t listen for crap. It’s like the whole “mom” super love thing just … changes them can’t see passed their baby. I’m 29 for example and still sometimes she will still try and “protect me” from things she THINKS will hurt me.
She realized what while adults understand the lessons you can learn from failure. It’s a tougher lesson as a child and children can switch focuses quickly and develop interests that give them joy. She maybe trying to protect him in a motherly way without realizing it goes against what she knows logically as a sport. Maybe she’s worried he may become disinterested if it’s too hot. He might lose the love of something all of you share.
Playing at her level might make her feel bad in a motherly way. She might not even realize it. Even if she does she might be denying it due to feeling deep down that her fears may also disrupt his growth in the game.
Maybe try to find moves that lead towards him finding a way to win. Set it in a way that it’s like after training with his mom he’s better now. Y’all aren’t training a grand master. You’re having fun with your child and sharing a hobby.
So, and this could be wrong, based on what you’ve said it seems that you might remain unattached from others in an emotional sense due to the childhood events listed above. And while it sounds like you can talk about those events in your childhood you haven’t worked through them properly. I would honestly recommend therapy of some kind, since those events could be holding you back from emotionally connecting and caring about others.
Of course I could also be off base, but I do hope this gets better because that will strain a relationship and cause problems in the future.
I bet they are having sex right now.
>>he says I should be willing to give up stuff for a relationship and I agree, I
You shouldn't agree, though! That's a bonkers attitude. You may want the just leave her bro comments to be kept to a minimum, but perhaps that is because you don't want to face reality? You already spend a ton of time with her to the exclusion of other pursuits, including a gym habit that is good for you. Youknow how much my partner & I give up for our relationship? Nothing. He does what he wants and needs, I do what I want and need, and then we meet in the gaps. And are happy.
Just do it, it works. You don’t have to hit them that nude, they are sensitive. He will cry about it not being the same. But it is. I just say if you don’t want this to happen again all you have to do is not fuck with me
I would even go as far as to say “I depend on him”. This feels like a dependency issue, since sex is off the table. OP wants to feel secure.