The father had his reasons and found it necessary. She’s not a victim because he got a dna test. He didn’t need consent to find out if the child he’s going to raise is his.
I can personally say I've seen well over 100 posts on here this year of people in your exact situation, and I can comfortably say less 5% are happy they stayed.
I only say less than 5% because I haven't scrolled through all the updated ones, but I have seen 0 where it wasn't emotionally taxing to even be proximal to the cheater, even if they wanted to stay.
You have a clause. You literally lose nothing except the woman herself. If she's really worth overlooking this….
My only suggestion that isn't leaving would be to confront her with the evidence, tell her she signs a new agreement acknowledging she broke the old one.
Give her a set frame of time (2 months, 6 months, a week, whatever you want) to provide tangible proof she's grown from her misdeed to your satisfaction, and you reserve the right to invoke the clause on the old agreement at any point if you feel you cant stay in the relationship.
Tangible being: reading books on infidelity from both sides on a psychological level. Attending therapy specifically to discover the root cause of her choice to damage your relationship. Then, after she's learned what caused this in her to attent couples therapy so she can learn to be a better communicator going forward.
Another thing I like to recommend is offloading a single domestic task you dont like doing. Dishes, trash, yardwork, whatever. Eventually, if you ever hit a point where forgiveness has been given completely, you can share the task again, and it will be an unspoken milestone that you both can reflect on as a turning point.
Tldr: You should leave. But if you dont or just want to try, make jer sign an agreement that the previous clause can be invoked for her actions at any time going forward. Then, make her do the naked work of discovering why she did this and learning how to avoid doing it again.
How frequently did you see each other in real life during this long-distance portion?
The father had his reasons and found it necessary. She’s not a victim because he got a dna test. He didn’t need consent to find out if the child he’s going to raise is his.
Some guys have much lower standards. For example, there's no chance she's carrying some other guy's child as a result of kissing a girl.
Why can't the kid wake up later?
Wait till we just switch the 9am bottom.
But agree he is an asshat and needs lessons in how to be a husband, a father and generally a decent person .
Quite literally, cash out.
I can personally say I've seen well over 100 posts on here this year of people in your exact situation, and I can comfortably say less 5% are happy they stayed.
I only say less than 5% because I haven't scrolled through all the updated ones, but I have seen 0 where it wasn't emotionally taxing to even be proximal to the cheater, even if they wanted to stay.
You have a clause. You literally lose nothing except the woman herself. If she's really worth overlooking this….
My only suggestion that isn't leaving would be to confront her with the evidence, tell her she signs a new agreement acknowledging she broke the old one.
Give her a set frame of time (2 months, 6 months, a week, whatever you want) to provide tangible proof she's grown from her misdeed to your satisfaction, and you reserve the right to invoke the clause on the old agreement at any point if you feel you cant stay in the relationship.
Tangible being: reading books on infidelity from both sides on a psychological level. Attending therapy specifically to discover the root cause of her choice to damage your relationship. Then, after she's learned what caused this in her to attent couples therapy so she can learn to be a better communicator going forward.
Another thing I like to recommend is offloading a single domestic task you dont like doing. Dishes, trash, yardwork, whatever. Eventually, if you ever hit a point where forgiveness has been given completely, you can share the task again, and it will be an unspoken milestone that you both can reflect on as a turning point.
Tldr: You should leave. But if you dont or just want to try, make jer sign an agreement that the previous clause can be invoked for her actions at any time going forward. Then, make her do the naked work of discovering why she did this and learning how to avoid doing it again.
Yeah?she just keeps teasing me over and over and I said it’s not funny or cute anymore it just pisses me off
No. If you go back, the circus music will start blazing!
Block her.