This is so damn sad. Makes me so grateful I got out of a similar situation, men like you never change. If Amy leaves you you'll look for another women in her late teens or early twenties to manipulate. YTA, fess up to her and be honest about everything
I think you should say yeah you’d like to be taller and also it would be great if she was shorter, you like shorter girls. It might be fun to flip her around in bed if she was smaller
And a hint for your future relationships – just because don’t see the problem with sleeping with your friends, doesn’t mean there isn’t one.
Until your partner understands the relationship between you and your friends, they have no way to be sure that there isn’t something going on, so either get them to understand right at the beginning, or hold off on it until they do.
so i asked him about the picture and he said that the first time he noticed that hair color looked good he saw it on someone in a state he was visting before he met me and so he googled that picture to show his bestfriend an example and said he’s never said another girl should dye her that color “only me” and his explore page was full of women until i brought it up to him two months ago and i haven’t seen any since.. not trying to defend him at all i’m jus seeing if you still have opinion?
Ok yes – on principle, we should all be capable of self assurance and not fishing for assurance. HOWEVER this is a game as old as time. We feel insecure, we ask for assurance. He should have known this was a cue to say ‘but I love your boobs!’. That’s the way it is! Or he should have kept quiet, and remained completely neutral (no face! The face counts!). I do it to men, men do it to me.
OP for what it’s worth I feel like he’s just totally goofed and was maybe trying to be empathetic and not seem like he was mansplaining your own feelings to you. I’m sure if you asked him, he’d say of course he loves every bit of your body and wants to have sex whenever he’s around you. However you have to figure out whether him not catching on to cues when you want reassurance is going to be a huge issue for you.
I had something similar happen with an ex where I asked what he thought about me without makeup. It was a whole conversation. I looked pretty alright without makeup but he goofed and stuck his foot in his mouth. However it was one of several communication and compatibility issues and it was the end of the line for us.
This was mentioned somewhere else in the comments too. So I just want to clarify that I don't do this. I don't save up a bunch of complaints and then unload all at once. It's always over 1 single event or issue – it can just take time for me to realize I was upset.
Ffs. Both of you need to have a fucking word with yourselves.
This is so damn sad. Makes me so grateful I got out of a similar situation, men like you never change. If Amy leaves you you'll look for another women in her late teens or early twenties to manipulate. YTA, fess up to her and be honest about everything
I think you should say yeah you’d like to be taller and also it would be great if she was shorter, you like shorter girls. It might be fun to flip her around in bed if she was smaller
For starters, has he ever apologized?
If he hasn't already done so, then he should write a heart felt apology. That could go a long way to soften your sister's heart.
When a person acts like shit, they shouldn't be too surprised when people try to get as far away from the 'stench' as possible.
Leave.
And a hint for your future relationships – just because don’t see the problem with sleeping with your friends, doesn’t mean there isn’t one.
Until your partner understands the relationship between you and your friends, they have no way to be sure that there isn’t something going on, so either get them to understand right at the beginning, or hold off on it until they do.
so i asked him about the picture and he said that the first time he noticed that hair color looked good he saw it on someone in a state he was visting before he met me and so he googled that picture to show his bestfriend an example and said he’s never said another girl should dye her that color “only me” and his explore page was full of women until i brought it up to him two months ago and i haven’t seen any since.. not trying to defend him at all i’m jus seeing if you still have opinion?
Nope. Sorry. Totally disagree with everyone here.
Ok yes – on principle, we should all be capable of self assurance and not fishing for assurance. HOWEVER this is a game as old as time. We feel insecure, we ask for assurance. He should have known this was a cue to say ‘but I love your boobs!’. That’s the way it is! Or he should have kept quiet, and remained completely neutral (no face! The face counts!). I do it to men, men do it to me.
OP for what it’s worth I feel like he’s just totally goofed and was maybe trying to be empathetic and not seem like he was mansplaining your own feelings to you. I’m sure if you asked him, he’d say of course he loves every bit of your body and wants to have sex whenever he’s around you. However you have to figure out whether him not catching on to cues when you want reassurance is going to be a huge issue for you.
I had something similar happen with an ex where I asked what he thought about me without makeup. It was a whole conversation. I looked pretty alright without makeup but he goofed and stuck his foot in his mouth. However it was one of several communication and compatibility issues and it was the end of the line for us.
This was mentioned somewhere else in the comments too. So I just want to clarify that I don't do this. I don't save up a bunch of complaints and then unload all at once. It's always over 1 single event or issue – it can just take time for me to realize I was upset.