It's just really nude to make a LDR work. On top of that many would argue that what you describe here isn't in fact a “real relationship”. Maybe see if you can't move this back in the direction of platonic friend, because that's what it sounds like.
She is going away to college so that is that. An LDR is a loser, especially with all of your uncertainty. By the time she returns, you will have become interested in someone else.
So the gaslighting she’s been doing to you really has taken full affect huh? You’re currently questioning if you have any right to be upset. That should be a giant red flag for yourself. She’s DARVO-ing you. She’s blows you off, dismisses your concerns, comes up with rational excuses for her actions, and playing the victim card (I haven’t done anything wrong since we got back together.) She has no reason to go back to that place, period. She can buy clothes online, other shops, etc. She has options, options that don’t involve an ex-AF. Instead of hearing you out, the partner with whom she’s supposed to be working with to rebuild trust, she’s shutting you down accusing you of trying to control her. She’s essentially guilt tripping you into shutting up.
It’s obvious that her apology for the affair was insincere. She’s going right back to her old habits. Do you know what it’s called when a person apologizes but there is no effort to change the toxic behavior? Manipulation. She has you thinking that you’re the one who is being manipulative, controlling, paranoid. I understand that divorcing isn’t easy but I can pretty much guarantee that in the long run it’s going to pay off. She’s legit messing with your head and stuff like that from a spouse can cause a serious mental breakdown. Are you going to be able to emotionally handle another affair? Assuming she hasn’t already restarted the last one.
Is the pregnant person the 3rd in your relationship? Or one of yalls mom? I don't get why you have to structure the whole wedding around them. It's going to be ridiculous if you hold it a month or 2 early and they go into early labor or have bedrest and can't make it. Or you delay it and they have complications, sick baby, are sick themselves and don't make it. Plan your wedding and focus on you and your partner making it. And the officiant. Everyone else will or won't and life will go on.
What are you expecting people to say here?
Wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't the first time either.
It's just really nude to make a LDR work. On top of that many would argue that what you describe here isn't in fact a “real relationship”. Maybe see if you can't move this back in the direction of platonic friend, because that's what it sounds like.
Honestly, what other explanation could there be? It’s bizarre.
She is going away to college so that is that. An LDR is a loser, especially with all of your uncertainty. By the time she returns, you will have become interested in someone else.
So the gaslighting she’s been doing to you really has taken full affect huh? You’re currently questioning if you have any right to be upset. That should be a giant red flag for yourself. She’s DARVO-ing you. She’s blows you off, dismisses your concerns, comes up with rational excuses for her actions, and playing the victim card (I haven’t done anything wrong since we got back together.) She has no reason to go back to that place, period. She can buy clothes online, other shops, etc. She has options, options that don’t involve an ex-AF. Instead of hearing you out, the partner with whom she’s supposed to be working with to rebuild trust, she’s shutting you down accusing you of trying to control her. She’s essentially guilt tripping you into shutting up.
It’s obvious that her apology for the affair was insincere. She’s going right back to her old habits. Do you know what it’s called when a person apologizes but there is no effort to change the toxic behavior? Manipulation. She has you thinking that you’re the one who is being manipulative, controlling, paranoid. I understand that divorcing isn’t easy but I can pretty much guarantee that in the long run it’s going to pay off. She’s legit messing with your head and stuff like that from a spouse can cause a serious mental breakdown. Are you going to be able to emotionally handle another affair? Assuming she hasn’t already restarted the last one.
Is the pregnant person the 3rd in your relationship? Or one of yalls mom? I don't get why you have to structure the whole wedding around them. It's going to be ridiculous if you hold it a month or 2 early and they go into early labor or have bedrest and can't make it. Or you delay it and they have complications, sick baby, are sick themselves and don't make it. Plan your wedding and focus on you and your partner making it. And the officiant. Everyone else will or won't and life will go on.