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cassie-smith chat
Date: October 4, 2022
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I think some people tend to see parallels between our exes. A lot of times it's just our brain trying to make connections. I wouldn't bring up that parallel. Just tell her that you notice she sometimes gets really quiet suddenly and there's a shift in the mood. Ask her if she notices it and if she can explain or reassure you when it happens.
We have a Splitwise log that we've kept since we moved in together.
If its not due to hygiene, then maybe ask him to consider a deodorant? I'd just be honest n let him know about the smell/scent n ask if he wld be willing to use deodorants or scented lotions or perfumes to help with the smell.
We’ll put!
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She used to do her chores and make supper once a week.
I think it really all started when she got a boyfriend. She thinks she is a grown up now and doesn't have to do chores and since she's hardly ever home, why should she (her words).
Showing her our budget is a good idea. I think we will do that. Let her know how much life costs and what she has to prepare for.
I would rather her go to college in our city but she sees this has an opportunity to go out on her own.. and it is an opportunity but I don't think she's ready for it if she can't balance her social and homelife now how will she do it there?
Now he will be your first breakup!
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Me and my boyfriend have been on and off for 5 years and we have lived with each other for the majority of that time. Recently, I came across a text message on his phone between him and an Asian Spa.
In the messages he was letting them know he was on the way and they responded with “the door is open” with an address. According to the time stamp on the messages, he went at midnight (after hours) on a night me and my sister had gone out for a girls night. On top of that, based on the text logs he had been to that same spa at least one time before almost a year ago.
Before confronting him, I did some investigating to see if this was a reputable spa and my findings were very sketchy. The spa is in a bad part of town, the place looks run down, I googled the phone number and one of the top results was for an escort service.
Based on my findings I felt like it was safe to assume that he wasn’t going here for an innocent back massage in the middle of the night.
When I confronted him, his first response was “why are you looking through my phone”. Mind you, I never look through his phone I just so happen to come across these texts when I was using his iPad. He of course denied doing anything bad and said the only wrong he did was not telling me he went.
However, I don’t buy it and I truly believe he was up to no good that night. Plus, I can admit that our sex life has been practically nonexistent for many months. We have talked about trying to “rekindle our flame” but it hasn’t happened yet.
My first instinct is to leave him. Mainly because I think what he did was grimy and I feel like I lost a lot of the trust and respect I had for him. I’ve been really conflicted about what I should do next. Should I stay with him or not?
I recently spoke to a guy friend who is also a therapist and he told me that this wasn’t a good enough reason to end a 5 year relationship. His logic was that my bf simply went to a spa to get a service done to get some relief and that since there were no feelings attached that it’s not really cheating.
And even tho I can agree with him, I still feel like I don’t want to be with someone who is so comfortable going out and doing that like it’s not big deal.
So, should I look past this event and hope it doesn’t happen again? Or leave before it’s too late?