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or is this a justified action by her
It absolutely is a justified action by her. According to your post, it's been 2 weeks since you last had sex. 2 weeks. You only “realized” how horrible you were to her two months ago. Hardly any time has passed and certainly not enough for you to have “completely changed” as you claim.
You need to back off and be patient. You were emotionally abusive and neglectful to your wife for years – half a decade – and now you're complaining about her not feeling comfortable or secure after 8 weeks.
Are you in therapy? If not, and you have the means, access it. This post is extremely troublesome and reeks of selfishness and only cements further the fact that you haven't changed anywhere near as much as you say you have.
So she did respect your relationship and told this person that what they said wasn’t ok. Honestly, it’s tough, because it’s naked to tell from your post how jealous you are. You have to trust your partner to make good decisions – if they are making good decisions. But at the end of the day, you guys have to communicate abs decide together what are the appropriate boundaries you accept. My last ex was constantly jealous of almost every male friend I had to the point that I was never allowed to ever see them one on one and constantly accused me of inappropriate behaviour. It was exhausting and eventually I realized it would never end.
He's probably fckn them