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Daniela 🙂, y.o.
Location:
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Live! Live Sex Chat rooms Daniela 🙂
Date: October 6, 2022
Daniela 🙂, y.o.
Location:
Room subject:
To Start live! video press there
If she doesn't care about him enough to address thee fundamental benefit of a relationship then she is using him. Cut out all of the sex and you're close friends and roommates.
I’m asking for advice not you telling me my relationship is toxic
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He probably doesn't want to do a long-distance relationship.
It doesn't sound like the two of you set out any sort of plan or expectations for the future, so he doesn't have any.
Go and have fun in NYC. See if things rekindle when you come back. If you have enough time there when you come back, and you both want to, maybe something solid will develop.
He then asked to see me and I said no. He got really angry and I tried to reason with him and he went crazy. I haven't heard a word since despite trying to reach out and apologise
Don't, just block him. He is not good for you and the 'relationship ' is toxic as heck. You would really benefit from therapy.
Get a prenuptial with your soon to be spouse. Protect all assets from prior to the marraige. Don't take your name off anything. Your brother should get some inheritance when your father does pass though.
I'm sorry, let me get this right:
You, a white woman, just EXPLAINED systemic oppression and the minority experience TO A BLACK MAN IN AMERICA because he had the nerve to have, um, experienced his own life and come to a different set of conclusions than you did, and to have a different take on it. And then you argued with him about how wrong he was . . . because he had the gall (again, as a Black man) to not toe your political line.
Lady, I'm not American, and I am far more politically left/liberal than anything else, but I am appalled by you. You need to sit down and get comfortable with your own white saviourism, your racism of low expectations, and the fact that you are trying to tell a marginalised person how to feel and react to their own lived experience instead of respecting their autonomy, their right to be respected as an individual, and their ability to determine what THEY feel is an appropriate response to the very problems you describe.
You, as a white woman, do not get to tell him how he is supposed to feel, what “his people's” experience is, or anything else. It's not your place, and it's egregiously patronising. Your S/O is literally a part of the community you are lecturing him about. You don't need to agree with him, but it takes a lot of gall (and frankly a little racism) to decide that because he doesn't feel the same way you do about what is best for HIS community, or how things look from the inside, that he is somehow objectively wrong. Have you lived in his body? Have you been a Black person in America? Then don't tell him he doesn't get to have an opinion because he doesn't share yours, even if you can't understand his.
Also, as an ethnic, multiply disabled person living in poverty, you are exactly the kind of (future) social worker I dread working with, because you lack the ability to comprehend nuance, and that makes you dangerous to people like me. It means I cannot trust you to keep me safe because I have to watch what I say around you lest I upset or offend you, even though your job is literally to support me and keep me safe, even though your beliefs are subjective, and my vulnerabilities objective facts. You shouldn't be working with vulnerable people if you cannot welcome and consider viewpoints other than your own.
girl you’re not his partner you’re his mommy…