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Nacht And Ysera, y.o.
Location: Ferelden
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Date: October 8, 2022
Hey, this is going to be harsh but he does not love you. Your partner should not be saying he wants to fuck your friends, or flirt with other women while in a relationship.
Just because you have a kid together doesnât mean you have to STAY together. Youâve stated couples counseling, he doesnât want to go and you canât force someone to do something. So instead I urge YOU to go to individual therapy and start making an exit plan.
Get your financials set together, pick up extra shifts if you can, sell the items you donât need and get the fuck away from this man. You can coparent, just like lots of people do.
Please know your worth girl, I promise you youâll be so much happier by yourself than with a loser who treats you like trash.
The solution is to find an SO who isn't an asshole.
I think you have to ask her to choose you or her friends.
Report her, that is a crime and definitely not fair for him. All because she wanted to keep a boyfriend, she is so selfish.
I wouldn't have done that either. That's precisely why I'm not dating someone with kids right now lol.
However she probably saw the frequency in which he had his kids and decided she could handle that with enthusiasm. What she didn't expect was to be an actual caretaker a few years later. (Which was naive because at any point something could happen to the mom and OP's bf would have full custody).
She def needs to date a man without kids next. Hopefully she learned her lesson here.
Itâs literally your marriage or the place you happen to love working? Iâd be devastated if my husband ever thought so little of our marriage.
You do need to decide. You can choose the job, or being with your family. And even if you do get a new job, you have ahead of you a lot of soul searching and communicating and all of those things that go into mending a relationship.
Well, you have to deal with your immediate situation. Make sure you have a place to stay, a way to get food, and so on, until you are able to get to wherever you want to live.
I'd assume that this woman will have no interest in you, romantically, at all. Don't do anything to try to get her to change her mind. That could be harassment, and get you in trouble with the law.
In the future, you may want to consider quitting a job only after you've established that there's an actual relationship and — thus — a reason to move.
You were not supposed to find anyone for sex just her. She probably thought at your age no one rose would even look at you. Well bad luck she found out others do actually fancy you as a safe pair of hands abd now she realises you could also be looking elsewhere. Open marriages normally end up with divorces few are successful!
Yep. I forgot about the âroommatesâ conversations. But now that you mention it, I remember that feeling very well.
Some people are takers, literally all take and as little give as they can possibly get away with.
I think the difference between you & me might be that looking back I knew better. There were plenty of red flags that I just ignored. If she changed her behavior after you were married then you likely are dealing with whatâs called a âcovert narcissist.â
Honestly, I know this subreddit is not big on direct comments like this, but itâs not going to change. Life is really short. If this is not what you want and you know it, get out now. You will not regret it, but I guarantee you will if you donât. Youâll have a much easier time knowing what you want in a parent now that you know what you donât want. I sure did.
HMU in my DM if you want to discuss more. Happy to help.
They probably had a good laugh at his expense while she did it too.