This was my same mentality, he ended raping me and SA me a few times and hitting also started being more common, even cutting me with things. I “loved” him too but guess what, he didnt love me, someone that hits you doesnt love you, love is not like that. Get tf outta there
Yeah, he’s lying or at minimum completely self-unaware. If you decide to stick around, you’re going to hear more & more comments like this because now the mask is coming off.
If he saw you while they were exclusive, then yes, it’s cheating. Seems you don’t know that.
The best move is to just let go and move on. You don’t know the facts and even if it’s the objective truth, it’s your word against his, which he’ll play as the words of a bitter ex.
I am also trying to get to FIRE and was starting to go down a road similar to your husband. I realized that $50 here and there doesn't make a huge difference. I ran numerous spreadsheets and simulations and realized that spending money on my family is worth it and won't slow down my goals enough to matter. We eat out several times a week, buy the nice car seats, etc. also, if you are saving $80k per year, starting from zero, you'll get to $1M in less than 10 years. I assume you aren't at zero. I suggest reading some FIRE blogs and the subreddit here to get familiar with what your husband has been obsessing over. Mr Money Mustache has some good articles on how to retire early AND live a good life while saving. My wife and i discussed me retiring before her so that we don't have to save as nude. Her job turned south, so now she is pushing harder than me. Sounds like he needs some therapy and to communicate better with you. Pure speculation based on my own experience but he possibly has some childhood trauma about money and hates his job. That combination is a disaster for a partner who wants to on-line a “normal” financial life.
And y’all can shame OP and others like him to your heart’s content. It won’t change how he feels about it. A lot of men out there just don’t someone who’s “been around the block”. I’m inclined to think one’s vitriol towards such a standard reveals more about them than the standard itself. Hell, some women have issues with it too when their partners have slept around and I’ve said the exact same thing, “if it bothers you that much, don’t be with them.” Plain and simple
Because when people are lying and hiding things that means there is something necessary to be hidden. She doesn't mind casually lying to you this alone would be enough for person with self-respect to leave her. Perhaps confronting her propely first, but that's not even necessary.
By working on your selfimage so you can actually accept compliments and genuine appreciation. It leaves a void in your boyfriend. Wanting to share your excitement and love for your partner only for them to vehemently reject it because they don't agree with you is.. tiring.
I wouldn't say I'm obsessed, but my looks have been a nightmare all my life.
And tell me about it. I used to be 80lbs heavier. My bodyimage is screwed to this day, I always think I am fat and ugly and can only see my flaws and where I need to lose more weight. But I do my best to really appreciate compliments and to even let them reach me and be happy for the support.
If he’s acting like he doesn’t like you (doesn’t want to talk to you/finds you irritating), it’s because it’s true. As harsh as that sounds, that’s the reality. It’s his fault for dating a teenager.
Seriously, do not waste any more tears on this guy. He doesn’t deserve you, Dump. His. Ass.
She killed all those men and those are her trophies
This was my same mentality, he ended raping me and SA me a few times and hitting also started being more common, even cutting me with things. I “loved” him too but guess what, he didnt love me, someone that hits you doesnt love you, love is not like that. Get tf outta there
if someone is embarrassed by normal human emotions, it is time to run like your ass is on FIRE!!
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Yeah, he’s lying or at minimum completely self-unaware. If you decide to stick around, you’re going to hear more & more comments like this because now the mask is coming off.
If he saw you while they were exclusive, then yes, it’s cheating. Seems you don’t know that.
The best move is to just let go and move on. You don’t know the facts and even if it’s the objective truth, it’s your word against his, which he’ll play as the words of a bitter ex.
Im sorry you’re dealing with this. Good luck.
I am also trying to get to FIRE and was starting to go down a road similar to your husband. I realized that $50 here and there doesn't make a huge difference. I ran numerous spreadsheets and simulations and realized that spending money on my family is worth it and won't slow down my goals enough to matter. We eat out several times a week, buy the nice car seats, etc. also, if you are saving $80k per year, starting from zero, you'll get to $1M in less than 10 years. I assume you aren't at zero. I suggest reading some FIRE blogs and the subreddit here to get familiar with what your husband has been obsessing over. Mr Money Mustache has some good articles on how to retire early AND live a good life while saving. My wife and i discussed me retiring before her so that we don't have to save as nude. Her job turned south, so now she is pushing harder than me. Sounds like he needs some therapy and to communicate better with you. Pure speculation based on my own experience but he possibly has some childhood trauma about money and hates his job. That combination is a disaster for a partner who wants to on-line a “normal” financial life.
And y’all can shame OP and others like him to your heart’s content. It won’t change how he feels about it. A lot of men out there just don’t someone who’s “been around the block”. I’m inclined to think one’s vitriol towards such a standard reveals more about them than the standard itself. Hell, some women have issues with it too when their partners have slept around and I’ve said the exact same thing, “if it bothers you that much, don’t be with them.” Plain and simple
Because when people are lying and hiding things that means there is something necessary to be hidden. She doesn't mind casually lying to you this alone would be enough for person with self-respect to leave her. Perhaps confronting her propely first, but that's not even necessary.
By working on your selfimage so you can actually accept compliments and genuine appreciation. It leaves a void in your boyfriend. Wanting to share your excitement and love for your partner only for them to vehemently reject it because they don't agree with you is.. tiring.
I wouldn't say I'm obsessed, but my looks have been a nightmare all my life.
And tell me about it. I used to be 80lbs heavier. My bodyimage is screwed to this day, I always think I am fat and ugly and can only see my flaws and where I need to lose more weight. But I do my best to really appreciate compliments and to even let them reach me and be happy for the support.
It really is not that nude.
If he’s acting like he doesn’t like you (doesn’t want to talk to you/finds you irritating), it’s because it’s true. As harsh as that sounds, that’s the reality. It’s his fault for dating a teenager.
Seriously, do not waste any more tears on this guy. He doesn’t deserve you, Dump. His. Ass.