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Letizia-Westt1 Public Chat Channel
Date: October 16, 2022
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This is the way.
That really sucks for you. I’m so sorry.
It's healthy to NOT go through each other's phones. Here are two sources, there are many but these are premiere organizations for DV in the US:
www. loveisrespect. org/resources/types-of-abuse
www. thehotline. org/resources/types-of-abuse
You have a right to privacy. That may be conversations between you and family or friends, or finding help about abuse, what websites you've browsed… Expecting partners to have no right to privacy isn't healthy. You feel you can trust someone without them giving you access to everything.
No you shouldn't. Be polite. Be kind. Tell her you are going to take a step back as requested then do it. Don't initiate any convo for seven days. It will help you gain clarity. And don't be passive aggressive about it, if you care about this person you have to realize that this maybe the end of the relationship or they just need you to do what they are asking.
I met my fiancee when she weighed about 150lbs(she was about 5'4). Over the duration of our relationship she gradually slowly gained more weight due to stress eating. Her mother and I didn't have a good relationship, but it was evident that the fiancee and her mother didn't have the best relationship previously.
Her mother often made snarky comments about her weight(which caused her to cry and eat a bag a chips(her go-to). I remember one particular time that I picked her up from her parents' house to go to my apartment and she told me that her mother told her that I was only with her until I found somebody skinnier. The prime reason that I developed issues with her parents was because of the things her mother would say to her, and seemingly her father's inability or unwillingness to curb that behavior. The kicker was that the mother blamed me. I GOT BLAMED for her weight gain.
Long story short, I never cared about her weight in the sense of how I felt about her. I wanted her to be healthy because I didn't want her to die or have serious health problems. I would have never, in a million years, told her “yeah you could lose 30lbs”.
Sidenote- some years after we broke up(her stress from different situations), I realized that her mother likely did care, but just chose very detrimental ways to go about it.
This is normal. Do you feel like he is pressuring you to keep them and look at them? Of course in person is best. Nudes are intimate and personal, it's fine that you don't want to keep them.
Past trauma never stays hidden forever. It can reveal itself while someone is young and hasn't yet built a life, or it can wait until there are the real gravities of a marriage, career and children to consider. So if she was going to have to experience this eventually it's better than it's happened while she still has time to resolve it without destroying too many other people's lives. For you to wish that she'd just left it untreated for who knows how many more years is kind of messed up. You're only thinking about yourself here. It is a fact that it's difficult (if not impossible) to embark on this kind of healing journey while still trying to keep a romantic partner happy. Perhaps if you could be more supportive her feelings for you would still be there once she's completed treatment.
felicitation. you made it great.
keep the evidence. you never know.
Dont give up on dating. Give up on her. She’s not in a good place to be dating anyone.
Does he even have it figured out at 25? I doubt it. Life is ever changing, requiring adaptations.
When did she complain?