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AiriBuffy Public Chat Channel
Date: October 8, 2022
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Its not about cheating or not, its about leaving the new girl in the dark without every detail needed to make the most informed decision about her would-be boyfriend. Personally, I’d turn down a guy I’m seeing if he asked me to be his girlfriend a day after he had sex with someone else. Its going to come out eventually anyway and she may not be cool with that.
My dad isn’t anyone. Don’t project ur shitty relationship with ur dad onto mine. He’s my everything & my support system. If i feel risk of being abused, even if it is by my husbands father, i will tell him. Bye now.
There's the lying, the lack of discipline/character and the disrespect for her and her boundaries. That's a lot. I'd make it clear that he's going to work his ass off to get my trust and respect back.
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Sure, maybe she has low self esteem. Doesn't excuse how all her “friends” are treating her.
.5% of men are total fucking weirdos and do this so it’s never wise to bet on it. There is legitimately a much better chance that he would put it on a toy to fuck himself on the ass
I'm kinda of confused, you go to a couple a year so she probably thinks you do like it?
You won't tell her you don't so I think it's unfair to say she bought the gift for herself in mind. Sounds like she probably thinks she's doing a nice thing you both enjoy by seeing a band you both enjoy.
I feel like this is a pretty normal birthday gift in relationships, you don't have to like it but I don't think she's being selfish about it either. But you do have to TELL her you don't like it for her to know.
When I eloped with my husband, we invited his family and my family (albeit, parents and siblings, that's all).
So sure, at that time, he didn't have the greatest relationship with his family and I didn't have the greatest relationship with mine. But everyone know we're together and very much married. No one is hiding anyone…
Your husband is kind of eerily 'off.' Maybe he is hiding you. Maybe he is living a double life.
OP, just start investigating. Don't give him a headsup.
She owes confidentiality to what her friends tell her in confidence.
Men's and women's communication patterns are different, in case you haven't noticed. Women are much more likely to have close and confiding friendships than are men.
So in short, this difference is normal. Whether it's “healthy” involves a value judgment, which I'm not about to make. Let's just say vive la difference!
You do not deserve this treatment at all. He is abusive and not respecting you. You mention past trauma, but you're probably writing-off his behavior as not as bad as it actually is due to experiencing past trauma. You're also blaming yourself in this situation because of past trauma, to which I want to tell you, this is not your fault. However you behave due to past trauma (or at all), you do not deserve this. No one deserves this. Please leave him.
if he indeed just wants a friendship with her and nothing inappropriate will ever happen
If I wanted to be friends with my ex, I would do everything possible to reassure my current partner of that fact. I would not completely dismiss her feelings. I would prioritize my partner's right to feel comfortable and safe in our relationship.
A relationship should be a sanctuary, not a battleground.
After he broke things off, was there any discussion about keeping in touch? And did he actually give a reason for breaking things off? Could he have decided to be exclusive with someone else and that didn't work out so now he's trying to reconnect with you?
As much as people might like to use labels like “exclusive” or “serious”, you can't control how attached you become to someone with anything but distance. If you have feelings for him but he has no intention of ever getting serious with you, you need to stop all contact with him for your own wellbeing.
I went camping with some friends and one friend was starting this huge group chat and spamming it. People left and she got upset and told me, “how are people supposed to know what to bring?” Ummmm they are adults. A potluck in a remote area sounds like a nightmare. If people don’t come prepared, then they can drive an hour to the closest store and learn their lesson next time. When I made a surprise birthday party for my roommate, I texted my friends a picture of her with crappy colored text all over the photo saying the date, time, place, “BYOB but I’ll provide some drinks too”, and BYOD (dog). Even with that, people showed up…
Yes. Do him and herself a massive favour.
Take yourself out of the equation OP, then he can pine pathetically after you too.