ences to know what kind of response the things he's doing will have. I'm just wondering why he would mess with his own life by doing it at the place where he works. Is this a job he could easily leave to the extent that he doesn't care if everyone at work starts to hate him for being an absolute jer
You're absolutely not crazy for “reading it wrong”, it sounds like he just had to admit that he didn't actually want it to go anywhere. The only thing you sabotaged was his fun. He IS going to continue to flirt with her, but that isn't going to go anywhere either.
If he ends up with a girl at all, she'll be some third girl you don't even know about.
she's in an abusive relationship. she's in abusive situations.
but by her returning and leaving over and over again, you're being emotionally abused too.
this has got to be a draining situation. if you care about her, try writing a letter NOT with the intentions of getting back with her. reach out to a family member or friend of hers or something and ask them to check on her.
she needs a non-romantic relationship with someone to ground her. and you need to distance yourself a bit.
You break up. Alcohol is no excuse for cheating. She actively chose to get drunk, and unless she decides to quit drinking for the rest of her life I don’t think I could ever trust her again.
I don’t know about you, but when I’m drunk I don’t go and do things that I’ve been taught are wrong for my whole life. I don’t go kill somebody or rob a store or attack people. Sure, these are more severe than cheating, but I’ve always known that cheating is wrong and alcohol would not make me cheat.
Well you can’t change it now. You learned a pretty bitter life lesson I’m sorry. But remember it’s never to late to change something. Build up your getaway plan secretly and play along with this bitch ass and leave him cold where he begs you to come back when he realized you are an actually human being with emotions that can’t bet treated like shit.
I nominate Dave Bautista as the 'mountain of a man'.
I think a little apron with a pink heart on it would suit him. Ofc the scones are too nude out of the oven “ow, ow!” so OP comes and runs moam's hand under the tap, he comforts the giant teddy bear “it's ok hon, I've got you” and helps him with the scones “let me help you my love” ? you've got me running away with that romcom now lol
He's perfect for the role and already a great ally ❤️
Well, sounds like your hope lies in the uncertainty. If it's hope you wish to cling to, don't be asking these questions. The truth is that if he cared enough he'd care. You wouldn't be left in a position to fall in love with another or question his intentions because you'd know. He would tell you the truth, if not he doesn't hold your feelings in as high regard as his own nor does he trust you enough to be that vulnerable. But like I said, as long as you're confused, you have hope. Otherwise, you don't need hope if you have the thing you hoped for, even if it's in the future you'd be hoping for something else. Just follow your heart and listen to your guts. If you want/need closure, get it. There's honestly nothing wrong with living to just be the best you but leaving your heart open to future possibilities with this person if you wish to. Just don't try to think their thoughts or figure out what they're thinking, just ask them. Whether their response in your opinion is good or bad you're honestly better off getting answers so you can keep on living your life with direction.
A lot of people are praising separate finances, but if I choose to separate my finances from my husband, it is because I want a divorce. Plain and simple, I may be the minority here but take advice with a grain of salt. The people praising this separation of assets may not grasp the reality this really is for some relationships.
Marriage counseling and just listening to her is what she needs now. I personally would walk on eggshells, make sure the house is spotless, and her fave meals are available, and be present in the evenings.
Is there a way you could also get a nicer vehicle?
Rereading this, I can see both sides but I’m more on your daughters and YTA. In any of this, did you come to an agreement or compromise for her consideration of this situation? You didn’t ask, you told your daughter to uproot her room for your sister and her kids. Your sister was needing the favor and if it was only temporary, why wasn’t a temporary solution be made for your sister instead of your daughter which is established in this situation? You also demanded your daughter sell her car for your sister and buy back her back. I get family is family, but I would be LIVID if my dad had asked me to sell my car (reading it sounds like your daughter enjoyed modifying her car and it’s a nice hobby and her eyes something she’s proud of). If you had the money to buyback her car, why not have gotten your sister a beater? Legally, your daughter did as she was asked and IMO in her eyes you forced her to make all these changes for her sister, sister got comfortable and your daughter got tired of what was stable for her now all her input, naked work, joys, privacy, and basic living has been ripped from under her. In one way she did overreact, but sounds like she hit her breaking point and also legally asked what you told her to do. You should have consolidated with your daughter before doing all this to get her input and taken in consideration of her feelings on this as you share(d) a roof with her, while also should have set a better boundary with your sister (your daughter sounds like she has her shit together better than your sister). Your last sentence really sealed the deal you took way too advantage of your daughter (leaving us with no transportation) and she probably felt as she was being used (which seems like the case). I don’t blame her for not talking to you or rest of the family or holding your fully grown sister with kids more accountable for turning a temporary situation into a long term.
Get your share of the $15K back first. Then break up with him. Someone this flaky and unreliable will not make a good life partner.
ences to know what kind of response the things he's doing will have. I'm just wondering why he would mess with his own life by doing it at the place where he works. Is this a job he could easily leave to the extent that he doesn't care if everyone at work starts to hate him for being an absolute jer
You're absolutely not crazy for “reading it wrong”, it sounds like he just had to admit that he didn't actually want it to go anywhere. The only thing you sabotaged was his fun. He IS going to continue to flirt with her, but that isn't going to go anywhere either.
If he ends up with a girl at all, she'll be some third girl you don't even know about.
she's in an abusive relationship. she's in abusive situations.
but by her returning and leaving over and over again, you're being emotionally abused too.
this has got to be a draining situation. if you care about her, try writing a letter NOT with the intentions of getting back with her. reach out to a family member or friend of hers or something and ask them to check on her.
she needs a non-romantic relationship with someone to ground her. and you need to distance yourself a bit.
It’s no one else’s responsibility. She made the choice, he doesn’t want the baby, she’s got massive life changes to make
You break up. Alcohol is no excuse for cheating. She actively chose to get drunk, and unless she decides to quit drinking for the rest of her life I don’t think I could ever trust her again.
I don’t know about you, but when I’m drunk I don’t go and do things that I’ve been taught are wrong for my whole life. I don’t go kill somebody or rob a store or attack people. Sure, these are more severe than cheating, but I’ve always known that cheating is wrong and alcohol would not make me cheat.
Well you can’t change it now. You learned a pretty bitter life lesson I’m sorry. But remember it’s never to late to change something. Build up your getaway plan secretly and play along with this bitch ass and leave him cold where he begs you to come back when he realized you are an actually human being with emotions that can’t bet treated like shit.
I nominate Dave Bautista as the 'mountain of a man'.
I think a little apron with a pink heart on it would suit him. Ofc the scones are too nude out of the oven “ow, ow!” so OP comes and runs moam's hand under the tap, he comforts the giant teddy bear “it's ok hon, I've got you” and helps him with the scones “let me help you my love” ? you've got me running away with that romcom now lol
He's perfect for the role and already a great ally ❤️
Well, sounds like your hope lies in the uncertainty. If it's hope you wish to cling to, don't be asking these questions. The truth is that if he cared enough he'd care. You wouldn't be left in a position to fall in love with another or question his intentions because you'd know. He would tell you the truth, if not he doesn't hold your feelings in as high regard as his own nor does he trust you enough to be that vulnerable. But like I said, as long as you're confused, you have hope. Otherwise, you don't need hope if you have the thing you hoped for, even if it's in the future you'd be hoping for something else. Just follow your heart and listen to your guts. If you want/need closure, get it. There's honestly nothing wrong with living to just be the best you but leaving your heart open to future possibilities with this person if you wish to. Just don't try to think their thoughts or figure out what they're thinking, just ask them. Whether their response in your opinion is good or bad you're honestly better off getting answers so you can keep on living your life with direction.
Yep that’s one rule I’m glad to have stuck to when single: never shit where you eat. Lol
I agree, you need to truly know your wife will understand ? I wouldn't LOVE IT but you can't be mad at that tbh lol
A lot of people are praising separate finances, but if I choose to separate my finances from my husband, it is because I want a divorce. Plain and simple, I may be the minority here but take advice with a grain of salt. The people praising this separation of assets may not grasp the reality this really is for some relationships.
Marriage counseling and just listening to her is what she needs now. I personally would walk on eggshells, make sure the house is spotless, and her fave meals are available, and be present in the evenings.
Is there a way you could also get a nicer vehicle?
Rereading this, I can see both sides but I’m more on your daughters and YTA. In any of this, did you come to an agreement or compromise for her consideration of this situation? You didn’t ask, you told your daughter to uproot her room for your sister and her kids. Your sister was needing the favor and if it was only temporary, why wasn’t a temporary solution be made for your sister instead of your daughter which is established in this situation? You also demanded your daughter sell her car for your sister and buy back her back. I get family is family, but I would be LIVID if my dad had asked me to sell my car (reading it sounds like your daughter enjoyed modifying her car and it’s a nice hobby and her eyes something she’s proud of). If you had the money to buyback her car, why not have gotten your sister a beater? Legally, your daughter did as she was asked and IMO in her eyes you forced her to make all these changes for her sister, sister got comfortable and your daughter got tired of what was stable for her now all her input, naked work, joys, privacy, and basic living has been ripped from under her. In one way she did overreact, but sounds like she hit her breaking point and also legally asked what you told her to do. You should have consolidated with your daughter before doing all this to get her input and taken in consideration of her feelings on this as you share(d) a roof with her, while also should have set a better boundary with your sister (your daughter sounds like she has her shit together better than your sister). Your last sentence really sealed the deal you took way too advantage of your daughter (leaving us with no transportation) and she probably felt as she was being used (which seems like the case). I don’t blame her for not talking to you or rest of the family or holding your fully grown sister with kids more accountable for turning a temporary situation into a long term.