You need to get out of this relationship. I don't have any short term solutions, but if you're keeping the baby, look for ways you can work or save up money. Make sure your husband cannot access that money. Save until you have enough to move out and survive for a few months.
The women at r/TwoXChromosomes have been known to help each other out by mentioning any resources someone in your position might need.
I read your update and u blamed yourself for reading. Omg, your boyfriend obviously think you are easy and not exciting. Why wouldn’t you want to know about this? why would people think you shouldn’t know just because he is just processing it? And why should they think you should accept it? And Why are you still with him? if he needs healing, then let him finish healing first before going out with you.
> I get frustrated with our lack of physical intimacy and it pushes me away and makes me feel more distanced. She gets frustrated with the other issues in our relationship and makes her not want to have physical intimacy with me. It's a continuing cycle that is causing us to feel less and less like we're an in love married couple and more like we're cohabitating and coparenting together. I want us to get back to some semblance of passion and romance for each other.
You need to sit down with her tell her exactly what you said here. You may not be able to fix the problem, but you can alleviate the stress it causes together.
This is exactly what me and my gf have been doing for a few years now and it's worked out fantastically well. We each put around half of our salary into our mutual account as soon as we get paid each month, and then use it to pay all our bills/groceries/family activities/nights out/trips/etc. What we each do with our individual money after that is beyond reproach.
For a long time I earned more than her, for the past year or so she's earned more than me. Since we contribute a percentage or our salary, it always feels fair.
Well he took me for lunch once but he was still working a lot during those few days. We didn't spend that much time together. After my second trip I became a bit resentful and spent more time with friends and working in my studio.
I will hopefully get a chance to talk to him when he comes back from his family visit more. The last time we spoke felt a bit rushed. Thank you for your comments.
Do you want to be with someone like this? Be real. She knows exactly who and how this guy is. She’s allowing him to be an adult bully to you. It’s more concerning she joins in to gaslight you. She will gaslight you about other things. That is dangerous territory when her friend is actively helping to destroy your self esteem..
Why didn't you just quickly send him a text à la “having issues at my meeting, taking longer, wait at the coffee place around the corner?”
You need to get out of this relationship. I don't have any short term solutions, but if you're keeping the baby, look for ways you can work or save up money. Make sure your husband cannot access that money. Save until you have enough to move out and survive for a few months.
The women at r/TwoXChromosomes have been known to help each other out by mentioning any resources someone in your position might need.
I read your update and u blamed yourself for reading. Omg, your boyfriend obviously think you are easy and not exciting. Why wouldn’t you want to know about this? why would people think you shouldn’t know just because he is just processing it? And why should they think you should accept it? And Why are you still with him? if he needs healing, then let him finish healing first before going out with you.
Stacking up arguments in an elaborated style. Pretty good.
Every sentence in itself is reason enough to leave that man.
But the final one is the final blow.
> I get frustrated with our lack of physical intimacy and it pushes me away and makes me feel more distanced. She gets frustrated with the other issues in our relationship and makes her not want to have physical intimacy with me. It's a continuing cycle that is causing us to feel less and less like we're an in love married couple and more like we're cohabitating and coparenting together. I want us to get back to some semblance of passion and romance for each other.
You need to sit down with her tell her exactly what you said here. You may not be able to fix the problem, but you can alleviate the stress it causes together.
This is exactly what me and my gf have been doing for a few years now and it's worked out fantastically well. We each put around half of our salary into our mutual account as soon as we get paid each month, and then use it to pay all our bills/groceries/family activities/nights out/trips/etc. What we each do with our individual money after that is beyond reproach.
For a long time I earned more than her, for the past year or so she's earned more than me. Since we contribute a percentage or our salary, it always feels fair.
Well he took me for lunch once but he was still working a lot during those few days. We didn't spend that much time together. After my second trip I became a bit resentful and spent more time with friends and working in my studio.
I will hopefully get a chance to talk to him when he comes back from his family visit more. The last time we spoke felt a bit rushed. Thank you for your comments.
Do you want to be with someone like this? Be real. She knows exactly who and how this guy is. She’s allowing him to be an adult bully to you. It’s more concerning she joins in to gaslight you. She will gaslight you about other things. That is dangerous territory when her friend is actively helping to destroy your self esteem..