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Alice, 24 y.o.
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Date: October 15, 2022
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Has you gf been to the gyno more than once in the last three years? If so, she must have gotten the std between then and now.
Don’t fall for her manipulation. Ask her to get retested and tell her she has one last chance to tell the truth or your done.
Has she consulted a plastic surgeon?
Youre dating a narcissistic loser. Women his age don't put up with his bullshit. Leave him immediately before he ruins your life.
I sometimes feel that’s the case but I’m don’t want to assume negative things about her
She should be paid what her work brings in. Nothing less,nothing more.
Men are not living ATMs.
I think there are some really significant, worrying things there. Pressuring you to move in and isolating you from your friends, never mind the projection re your best friends wife. Honestly, GTFO asap. You are not responsible for her lack of friends and family and you can’t sacrifice yourself to keep her happy. You asked how can you tell whether something is toxic…it’s when one persons needs take over and the other partners life is being restricted and narrowed. Like yours is. Leave, build you career and find someone who accepts you as you are and doesn’t shut you down.
Looks like they want a Third tbh
God I'd never put my boyfriend through this I'm so sorry dude.
Go read your own comments. You've been spouting misogynistic BS this entire post. She might be cheating on you but you come across as an insecure, misogynistic and controlling man. Grow up and maybe you can have an actual adult relationship one day.
You will always be a doctor, your brother won't nessarly be always married, go to the graduation, you earned it
Also, be surprised if brother did not know your graduation date when he planned the wedding
You do need time to get your head right. Time away from him. Because you are NOT over-reacing, you are, in my opinion, under-reacting.
He abused you for a decade and a half, and now you're not good enough? Again? Even with no alcohol involved? Hun, he is still abusing you emotionally. He knows what he's doing. He was saying those things when he was drunk because he believed them, and because the alchohol removed the filter that let him know saying shit will make you leave for good. He still thinks those things, obviously, he's just not saying them out loud at this time.
You deserve much better. MUCH, much much much. Do NOT fall for the sunk cost fallacy, where because you already wasted so much time with this loser, you decide to waste the rest of your one time only limited edition gone forever once it's over life hoping he'll eventually learn to love you and treat you with respect.
He won't learn to love you and treat you with respect. It is entirely possible that he literally can't. That is not your problem, and you should stop suffering because of whatever fucked up shit he grew up with. It is NOT an excuse, and it does NOT mandate you to stay and “fix” his abandonment issues. As you saw, all it leads to is pain because he doesn't want to fix his abandonment issues! See how well it's working out for him to not work on it? He has you twisting yourself into pretzels to tell yourself you should get over him telling you you're too fat to love. And you have been for a decade and half, and will continue to do so for another 3 decades unless you leave now.
His issues are NOT your problem, and he (and you!) have made it your problem for about a decade and a half too long.
The only way to fix this problem, the ONLY way, is to leave. He will never change. You cannot make someone respect you or treat you with gentle kindness. You cannot cause someone to wake up and see what they're throwing away. You cannot hope or love someone enough to make them care about hurting you.
You can only decide if you've finally had enough, or if you feel up to wasting another decade on this chump, only to be left single and homeless when he trades you in for a newer model (because you and I both know he is actively looking and will jump at the chance if he gets it and then blame you).
Your marriage is over. That “ick” you describe only goes away if you bury it deep and ignore it, and then it doesn't actually go away, it just tears your mind and body apart from inside over time until you are barely a shell of a person.