Hi gal- sounds to me like this man might not be the best with words—I’d be feeling the same way in your shoes.
I think a better way to look at this from an outsider’s perspective is – he believes you’re LOYAL. You didn’t just run when he’s naturally prone to running and it made him feel safer in return.
I don’t believe he’d have married you if he didn’t love you tons as someone who tries to “push people away” —- that sounds to me like he was a little insecure and self sabotages and you helped him break that
It sounds like you feel miserable because of your thoughts, not because of anything that is directly happening in your life. Have you considered talking to a therapist and getting your mental health back on track? Then you can forget about all of this, you can forget her, and you can go to sleep with 20 somethings and whatever else you want to do with your life.
No I am sure I wouldn’t put up with this, but the reason I asked not to mention it is because I don’t search for the reason right now but an advice to how to handle it
You didn't overreact at all, justly you are absolutely right to adress what you don't like and wouldn't want. He is the one overreacting here, he is the one acting very off.
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Hi gal- sounds to me like this man might not be the best with words—I’d be feeling the same way in your shoes.
I think a better way to look at this from an outsider’s perspective is – he believes you’re LOYAL. You didn’t just run when he’s naturally prone to running and it made him feel safer in return.
I don’t believe he’d have married you if he didn’t love you tons as someone who tries to “push people away” —- that sounds to me like he was a little insecure and self sabotages and you helped him break that
I’ve been in a similar situation and that’s a shit move by the other parties.
You need to get it all out in the open and there’s probably a few extra surprises as well.
Disrespectful & Deceptive.
I would end it
It sounds like you feel miserable because of your thoughts, not because of anything that is directly happening in your life. Have you considered talking to a therapist and getting your mental health back on track? Then you can forget about all of this, you can forget her, and you can go to sleep with 20 somethings and whatever else you want to do with your life.
No I am sure I wouldn’t put up with this, but the reason I asked not to mention it is because I don’t search for the reason right now but an advice to how to handle it
Let potential boy know that, sometime after the first few dates but before the I love yous come into play
You didn't overreact at all, justly you are absolutely right to adress what you don't like and wouldn't want. He is the one overreacting here, he is the one acting very off.