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April Stone , ♥, 18 y.o.
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Date: December 20, 2022
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It's about hindsight. Not about doubting her. What's the best course of attack moving forward? In my view, OP should discuss with her gf about the potential that he was making a move. Asking what the conversation was like.
“reconnect” Your husband was never connected to them, except for the act of violence in his family's home. Your father may say he's sorry but I'm inclined to agree with your husband that this might be unhealthy or potentially dangerous environment for you to be alone in. Frankly, I think it might be dangerous for him to be there with you. My advice, invite your parents to stay at an Air BnB and arrange public outings and don't be alone with them. For their protection and your own. “this is our way” is not a good enough reason to tolerate abuse and mistreatment.
This is probably an unpopular opinion but crushes in committed relationships I think are indicative of something missing in the existing relationship. If you’re having a crush you are not 100% happy with your partner and you would be lying to yourself if you said you were. My advice is hold off on marrying your fiancé and dig into why it is that you developed feelings for that guy. What is the idea of being with him giving your that is missing with your fiancé.
If you choose to ignore the issue it WILL snowball. I would not want to marry someone who has a crush on someone else while we are engaged. How would you feel if your fiancé had a deep crush on someone right now?
You don’t, you had your chance, you blew it. You only want her because she’s moved on. Let her be with someone who will know what they’ve got. Move on and consider this a very valuable lesson in life
We, as a couple, don’t go around him often in the first place because I’ve made it clear I don’t like him. But he is still someone that is important to SO. I’m normally really quiet and a people pleaser so I try not to ruffle any feathers and deal with it when we go to an event with his friend group and that friend is there. So I wasn’t sure what I could say to make it know something is inappropriate without bringing to much attention to it. But I will be definitely taking this advice and using these lines when/if something is said going forward.
I’m proud of her too. Your wedding is supposed to be one of the happiest days. OP was beyond miserable. It would have been a massive mistake to go ahead with it.