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AvuhAnn, 19 y.o.
Location: United States
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Date: January 8, 2023
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tell her you're rethinking your engagement. Don't whine, don't give ultimatums, don't make demands, and don't set boundaries. Don't be upset.
Just tell her that you both know it's inappropriate, and yet she's fine with his behaviour… and wants more. You're not fine with it, and therefore a marriage is doubtful in being successful.
She'll get angry, yell, cry, or do all kinds of things. Ignore it. Don't defend yourself, or argue, or justify yourself.
If she does anything but hurriedly gets this guy out of her life and is apologetic to you… you're done.
Haha you're right. I use the term crush loosely because what else can I call her?
Honestly I think her texts were lacklustre at first because she wanted to meet in person. I should've asked her out right away. The chemistry was overwhelming. This was our 4th night together but the first time we sat next to each other. We flirted the whole night. She stated touching me and forced our numbers into each other's phones. All the signs were there so I should've acted quick.
That's the reason why I used the word “close” to a sexual assault. If he hadn't hugged her 1st and said all that stuff, I would have said harassment.
There is no right and wrong in this.
He expressed what he felt respectfully. And no he is not being too insecure by this. Being friends with your ex is one thing, being close friends with one is another. You seem like you are really close with your ex and while that's fine, there will be a lot of people who will be uncomfortable about it.
Moreover I feel like your reasoning is also all over the place – your bf didn't ask them to throw it away. He asked you not to wear them. You say that it's the only expensive jewellery you have so your bf asked if you wanted alternatives. In short while you are saying that the reason why you keep them is because they are expensive, that doesn't seem like the case here – you are wearing them because it is a reminder of your ex. Which is fine if you are sure that there are no feelings between you guys now, but I see why your bf is uncomfortable.
Just out of curiosity OP, when did you and your ex break up, when was the last backslide and who broke up with who?