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? Charlotte ?, y.o.
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Date: December 31, 2022
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And you made this person your wife?
She needs to start seeing a psychiatrist. You need to communicate that you hope she'll consider it.
For things to get better, she needs to want for them to get better. She needs professional help. If she won't get it, your choice is accept things as they are or decide it isn't an existence you're okay with.
There's always the chance of her projecting on to you and is covering up her own indiscretion, but ultimately you need decide to trust her and repair or that you don't trust her. If there isn't trust, there shouldn't be a relationship.
Ultimately, I think that the best course of action is a divorce, but all I'll suggest is that you take the sunk cost out of it: as she is, is this person someone you want to be in relationship with?
Your boyfriend is a baby himself.
Why are you with someone who doesn't brush their teeth?
Is the ambition she lacks limited to diet & exercise? Are fitness goals the only ones she’s failing to meet?
You say she works from home but that she doesn’t do anything- do you mean that she works & that’s it, or do you mean that her job is inconsequential?
Dear OP, I’m sorry, but that is rape. I was also raped by someone I loved and it took awhile for my brain to allow me to acknowledge that. This man doesn’t love you or care for you, you should leave him immediately.
I won’t suggest going to the cops, as it’s not a route I even wanted to take, but it is an option, just fyi.
If you don’t think you can be just friends with him, then you probably have to drift apart now that he’s with someone.
But I have a question – from what you wrote, it sounds like he attempted multiple times to tell you he had romantic feelings for you and could see a relationship. And you interpreted that as… lying? Can you say why you felt that way? It seems like he decided you won’t ever be into it after you turned him down again, so naturally him finding a partner was bound to happen. If you had these feelings, why not ever give it a try?