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Date: October 8, 2022
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It's a protection mechanism. You try to reduce your stress by removing yourself from actual and potential stressful situations.
To “improve”, you just need more experiences in dealing with situations in a productive way. You need to know what to do in those situations so you come out on top. Think equivalent of army boot camp in whatever capacity that you can get to.
If you go apologize, congratulations you just admitted guilt.
Op you need to respect his wishes. That's the best way to repay him, by respecting him
I’m a dude but I wouldn’t be totally comfortable with it.
I’m not sure if that’s an insecurity thing or not.
I think it’s reasonable to be weirded out because that seems something very specific between people in a relationship. Like I don’t think that would be an appropriate type of hug with a family member either.
Do you and your boyfriend share this account?
Umm you broke up with him, and judging by his response not the first time.
So there is nothing to talk about, the relationship is over.
You need to move on.
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Don't use your past abuse as a baseline for what you should want or deserve. You aren't happy where you're at, and it doesn't sound like that is going to change in the new year. Your partner is unlikely to reflect and do what he needs to be a proper pillar of support. You've already asked for that, and he shut you down.
You will be at the end of your rope and forced to make this transition sooner or later. It may as well be sooner. Definitely don't get married unless some drastic changes are made. It sounds like you would be better off single and focused on yourself and your mother – there is nothing wrong with that. Don't jump into another relationship until you're ready.
Sounds like dude is looking at the realities of having a baby and realising it’s gonna be hot and he’s changed his mind. But he can’t say that so he’ll just blame you instead. I woukd sit him down and say “first, don’t get your brother to send me nasty texts ever again. Second, we aren’t having a surprise baby. This was a joint decision. If you’re scared or something, that’s fine. We’ll talk it out. But me baby trapping you? My husband of several years? Pull your head out of your ass.”
What the hell is a flying kiss?
You got married when you were 18 and she was 26? How long did you guys date before marriage?
Yeah her posts tell me her marriage has issues. Has a 3 month old baby, the father sleeps 12+ hours. Talks about trying to “sleep train” her husband. Age gap issues for sure.
This whole leaving the wedding bands off sounds like a recipe for disaster and I don't buy a single bit that she took it off to clean and had forgotten to put them back on for a whole month, after 11 years of that never having been a thing.
I agree with this, thank you so much for the advice I appreciate your time and efforts ?? and yeah it will hurt for a little but I am grateful I saw this situation happen before him and I got closer, better walking out of it with a few bee stings rather than nuclear bomb wounds
Yikes. Well, you can tell him if he wants a wedding so bad he can plan it himself. But he's acting so horribly I'd reconsider the whole relationship. Is he going to act like this about every decision or plan in your lives?
My husband wasn't super involved in wedding planning but he was happy to help with decisions, like visiting venues and picking food. We had to unite against my MIL lol, but that brought us closer.
A big test of relationships is how you interact during stressful decision making. Your guy is failing that test pretty badly.
He won’t ever call? You’re not dating. He’s married. Or he’s some 12 year old girls or a 60 year old man pranking you.