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Date: October 17, 2022
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If you’re from the USA you elect him as President.
Yes… in two ways. One being he can't control his anger over small inconvenience and two, he feel a like telling you will impress you. It's a two tiered red flag.
Youd rather him sleep with someone else than get high lol?
Probably breaking up would be best and figure out the house stuff too. I wish i had a gf who to spend time with and these dudes not caring at all
He says he loves me and that he doesn’t think he’ll break up with me
Oh great stuff, he doesn't “think” he's going to break up with. So he's on the fence, going to give it a ruminate.
If this guy can ditch relationships and friendships on a whim of “oh I sad, bad time, bye now, don't let the door hit you on the way out” then how can you ever feel secure in a relationship with him? You probably can't.
Honestly, I'd want to have words with your parents. This guy can just pick and choose his friends and relationships, yet your parents like him? Also, parents aren't always a good metric for good partners (sometimes they are in fairness, it's not 100% either way.)
It's no surprise that you don't feel comfortable here, he could ditch you and all his friends at a moments notice. In fact, during a fight, he used the break up card because he knows that's a weak point for you. That's really shitty on his behalf. Maybe it was off the cuff on his part, or maybe he knows that he can get you to fall in line by threatening that every time an argument happens.
You say you've never loved someone the way you love him. Granted, that feeling is no less real for you at 18 than it is for me at 42, but he's just one guy in a world of MANY guys. From shit to fecking awesome, a whole maelstrom of options out there. I don't doubt you'll feel more for someone in the future that isn't him, by age alone, you've only started shopping…. and it's a BIG shop.
Don't give your heart to someone that treats it so casually.
I doubt this is salvageable. However, in the future, this can be avoided by avoiding even the look of impropriety. Basically, don't contact ex's, there is a reason they are an ex.
Why look for something that's not there? If he says he's straight then believe him.
“Hi, just wondering if one of us wants to move out, how would that work? Is there a penalty for breaking the lease?”
First read your house copy of the lease, of course.
i have been on both sides of this issue. i broke up with someone over our sexual comparability (among other things)
i’m also 23F and just broke up with my ex 26M. he cheated on me bc i haven’t been wanting sex for awhile and because he’s a scumbag. i begged him to breakup with me before cheating since he did it before (at the beginning of our relationship)
i can’t tell you how much i wish he would’ve broken up with me first. i have deeply wounded. after i found out, i fell apart just asking “why? why couldn’t you have just. broken. up. with me? why would you put me through this?” it’s brutal. this guy did the decent and considerate thing and i envy you in some ways
it’s going to be okay. you wanna be with someone who truly wants to be with you. just how you are. or whatever the hell sounds good! you don’t have to date anyone if you don’t wanna
To be honest, I would break up with him. He is being creepy by keeping intimate pictures and videos of former partners. Do these former partners know that these pictures/videos were even taken?
If you do choose to stay with him, it is very possible that you may never get over this uncomfortable feeling. First step would probably be communicating with him, but I don’t think that would work in this case considering he argued with you for keeping a video he wasn’t supposed to have vs apologizing or even deleting it once he was no longer seeing this other girl. This whole situation just gives off major red flags…
Why I am not able to see comments.. Please dm me. I can't see nothing. Only first comment I'm able to see. I know.. My acting is like I'm a teenager. Maybe because I loved him since last 10years. My mind is still caught in that time..
Let's focus on the fiance first. You know him better than us so at 26 what kind of things would trigger him to physically fight someone? Is this something he usually does? Frankly, his telling you to never talk to your former best friend and refusing to talk about what happened is something that should stop the wedding. Knowing why the fight happened is a hill worth dying on.
Onto the best friend…that's a pretty callous way to end a friendship. Has he ever expressed romantic interest in you? Has he ever expressed reservations about your fiance?
I guess alcohol could have been involved but for two grown men who don't usually fight people to fight each other something serious enough to talk about must have happened. Do you have mutual friends you can talk to?
Having trauma is a bit like being hit by a car, in that it doesn’t absolve you of the responsibility for your behavior going forward.