Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
I would tell her that this is legitimately a dealbreaker issue for you. Sit her down but expect her to be defensive af. She probably thinks it's just a silly, cute thing that girls do.
I wonder if her size has something to do with it? You say she has 8 inches and 80 lbs on you… she might want to feel “cute” and think the food thing is the way to do it. A lot of larger women struggle with their size and feeling less girly because of it. That could be completely wrong, but it might be a possible reason for her actions.
I guess I just can’t imagine a situation in which there isn’t an inherent power imbalance in such an age gap. Especially when the younger partner is in their early 20s and the elder in their 30s or older.
I appreciate your perspective. It would be silly to say such an age gap can never work. But I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a healthy example of it.
Hello /u/_Sulaco_Nostromo_,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
I would tell her that this is legitimately a dealbreaker issue for you. Sit her down but expect her to be defensive af. She probably thinks it's just a silly, cute thing that girls do.
I wonder if her size has something to do with it? You say she has 8 inches and 80 lbs on you… she might want to feel “cute” and think the food thing is the way to do it. A lot of larger women struggle with their size and feeling less girly because of it. That could be completely wrong, but it might be a possible reason for her actions.
I guess I just can’t imagine a situation in which there isn’t an inherent power imbalance in such an age gap. Especially when the younger partner is in their early 20s and the elder in their 30s or older.
I appreciate your perspective. It would be silly to say such an age gap can never work. But I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a healthy example of it.
Try the pattern suggested by non violent communication:
Facts- I see dust bunnies on the floor Feeling: I am surprised to see them Request : could you please vacuuum?
If it works, he is autistic. If it doesn't, he is just a regular asshole
I can see that there are comments, but everything shows as no comments – FML lol
either block them or don’t respond
Every day you spent with her exacerbates the trauma.
I recommend the book “Cheating in a Nutshell”.
If you have the time and money finding a therapist with experience in betrayal trauma will help you a lot.