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Emma_Jhons0n, 19 y.o.
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Date: October 9, 2022
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So happy for you
Why are you friends with a young, single, attractive woman? You know that looks bad. A 38yo married man has no business with a 26yo single woman unless his wife is part of the friendship.
I'd just talk with your wife about it. No single female friends is not reasonable for most couples, but this friend is a very clear boundary-breaker. I'd say the “no single female friends at all” doesn't work for you, but that you're willing to break away from this new friend, or that you're willing to be friends with this new person only in conjunction with your wife. That means your wife is also friends with her and you're not seeing her or talking with her in a way that excludes your wife.
And if your wife isn't okay with this friendship at all, you have to decide if this random young woman is more important than your marriage. If it's making your wife feel less secure with you, why would you even want that? If it's truly just a friendship, it seems ridiculous to choose a new friendship over your wife's feelings of security.
You understand why he would be upset because you’re so used to being controlled and manipulated that your mind is talking gibberish. Who else needed permission to go out with you? Who else lost their man for going? Which ones of your friends aren’t allowed to go out? He did you a HUGE favour! My advice is to tell family how bad things are and not return. Get your life back!!!
I would have put a strict boundary around this relationship. Which is that I would nice to the child obviously but I would not be now or ever the father. Why? The father of this child is alive and well and is in her life.
He isn’t some dead beat and not around. So it gets confusing. This is one of the big reasons why I am of the opinion that modern men and women can’t get married. They just aren’t suitable for marriage. They don’t have the capacity and capabilities to maintain a long term relationship. It takes a lot and both this girls father and mother have come up deficient in many ways.
Break up immediately, do you know how many sister posts there are on Reddit some horrific ones….With husbands or boyfriends. It is not worth it.
I dont know why you expect him to trust you when you were talking to youd ex in the beginning and now at the first sign of trouble you're running straight back to your ex and venting all the private emotional conflicts you've been having with your BOYFRIEND to your EX.
Thats a huge violation of trust and you don't sound mature enough to be in a committed relationship if you keep your toxic ex around. Especially venting to him about your issues. That just gives him the idea that he has an in to get back with you if shit doesn't work out with your boyfriend. You should've blocked your ex 9 months ago.
Stay single for a while.