Nope. But I ain’t got time for a guy who’s going to pitch a fit about it.
And yes guys do in general. I’ve seen studies (at least one dating site at one point looked into first message replies based on stated education level – surprise the higher educated the man the more responses while the lower educated the woman the more responses) and have experienced it myself – guys are exponentially way more insecure about it.
Do I want a guy that can support himself? Hell yea! Non negotiable. Do I need him to support me? Nope. As long as he’s responsible with the money he has we can figure things out and make it work.
Okie dokie now I get it. I was getting lost in the pronouns. Hmmmm. How was she with the abortion, did she suggest the abortion or did you?
The fact that this guy is a Christian and she told him about the abortion speaks a lot to me. But I can't say the possible reasons without more info. Cos it could be a whole range of reasons.
I fell into a deep depression a few years ago and could barely get out of bed. My husband and I didn’t have sex for over a year. He never complained once. I would tell him how bad I felt about it and how it wasn’t fair to him. Every time he would just hold me and tell me how much he loved me and it didn’t matter. That we could never have sex again and that would be just fine. That he would never want to be with anyone else. There IS another guy out there for you that will love you and be there for you and understand. YOU deserve that. Don’t let that jerk convince you that it’s your fault that he is a piece of shit. He is just an absolute piece of shit and isn’t worth your time or love. It’s really hard to leave and it really sucks but I promise it’s so worth it. You are amazing and you deserve better. Don’t let that jerk convince you otherwise. ?
He made that promise a decade ago, and they’ve been living it every day since. It’s not like he promised ten years ago he’d buy her a car and then changed his mind. They’ve been actively doing his plan for ten years, far longer than initially intended. And now he’s “changed his mind” to thinking, you know what, since you sacrificed everything for ten years and I like that, let’s just do that forever, okay? I can’t believe you would use the fact that the promise was so long ago and as an excuse for him to blow it off, when she’s been suffering with the situation the whole time. Shameless, really.
Look, I get that when you are in a relationship where you are constantly being put down that it can make you question your own self perception. On top of that you by default want to give him the benefit of the doubt, that's part of being in love.
But the dude is calling you a b word. That's calling someone a name. He could have just said 'it feels like you really enjoy trying my patience' or something like that, already a pretty negative thing to say, but he chose the more vulgar framing for emphasis and insult.
But you know that. You are 28. You shouldn't be quibbling over the semantics of whether b word counts as name calling. You should instead be wondering why you are staying in a relationship where you are frequently called one, or why if he is so insistent he dislikes you he is choosing to stay.
Maybe he was able to figure out his low libido issue, maybe being left by you set him on a path to try to be better, who knows. I'm sure your husband would be asking “what's wrong with me that has her hung up on what her ex is doing?”
I did not think I needed to mention that she should not basically flirt with her male friends in front of me.
He's bad at sex and you should dump him for it.
Nope. But I ain’t got time for a guy who’s going to pitch a fit about it.
And yes guys do in general. I’ve seen studies (at least one dating site at one point looked into first message replies based on stated education level – surprise the higher educated the man the more responses while the lower educated the woman the more responses) and have experienced it myself – guys are exponentially way more insecure about it.
Do I want a guy that can support himself? Hell yea! Non negotiable. Do I need him to support me? Nope. As long as he’s responsible with the money he has we can figure things out and make it work.
Okie dokie now I get it. I was getting lost in the pronouns. Hmmmm. How was she with the abortion, did she suggest the abortion or did you?
The fact that this guy is a Christian and she told him about the abortion speaks a lot to me. But I can't say the possible reasons without more info. Cos it could be a whole range of reasons.
Didn't you leave her on read? Why would she talk to you again when you didn't answer when she talked to you last time?
I fell into a deep depression a few years ago and could barely get out of bed. My husband and I didn’t have sex for over a year. He never complained once. I would tell him how bad I felt about it and how it wasn’t fair to him. Every time he would just hold me and tell me how much he loved me and it didn’t matter. That we could never have sex again and that would be just fine. That he would never want to be with anyone else. There IS another guy out there for you that will love you and be there for you and understand. YOU deserve that. Don’t let that jerk convince you that it’s your fault that he is a piece of shit. He is just an absolute piece of shit and isn’t worth your time or love. It’s really hard to leave and it really sucks but I promise it’s so worth it. You are amazing and you deserve better. Don’t let that jerk convince you otherwise. ?
He made that promise a decade ago, and they’ve been living it every day since. It’s not like he promised ten years ago he’d buy her a car and then changed his mind. They’ve been actively doing his plan for ten years, far longer than initially intended. And now he’s “changed his mind” to thinking, you know what, since you sacrificed everything for ten years and I like that, let’s just do that forever, okay? I can’t believe you would use the fact that the promise was so long ago and as an excuse for him to blow it off, when she’s been suffering with the situation the whole time. Shameless, really.
Look, I get that when you are in a relationship where you are constantly being put down that it can make you question your own self perception. On top of that you by default want to give him the benefit of the doubt, that's part of being in love.
But the dude is calling you a b word. That's calling someone a name. He could have just said 'it feels like you really enjoy trying my patience' or something like that, already a pretty negative thing to say, but he chose the more vulgar framing for emphasis and insult.
But you know that. You are 28. You shouldn't be quibbling over the semantics of whether b word counts as name calling. You should instead be wondering why you are staying in a relationship where you are frequently called one, or why if he is so insistent he dislikes you he is choosing to stay.
Maybe he was able to figure out his low libido issue, maybe being left by you set him on a path to try to be better, who knows. I'm sure your husband would be asking “what's wrong with me that has her hung up on what her ex is doing?”