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Helen, 22 y.o.
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Date: November 2, 2022
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Agree to give them 25% of your earnings for your nephew as soon as they provide 50% of their current income to help support you. Problem solved.
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Most of the time the genders are reversed, but the only way I've seen for a parent to get out of parental responsibility is if they are replaced. So he can likely take you to court and force you to pay child support until the kid is 18 and that order would continue unless and until he were to get married and have his partner adopt the child and take up your responsibilities legally. But even then, that's only if they actually formally adopt, he could get married and still take your money until the kid is 18.
And if you DON'T get a court order and don't pay him any support now, he could sue you for back child support in 10 years and likely get it. This is one of the few obligations you can't get out of legally just because someone says so and a lot of men face this exact scenario and it sucks.
Need to take her off her pedestal and see her as she truly is. She’s a liar and a cheater and your whole relationship was built on a lie. After her confession, this relationship is now dead. You need to mourn it the way you mourn a normal death. And then you need to decide what you’re going to do try a new relationship with somebody that you know is a liar and cheater or separate yourself from this person, and find yourself someone new
You are sacrificing your mental health, I’m sorry. Your gut is telling you the truth and I hope the comments help validate your concern. Your friends being biased towards you is a good thing, it’s not a reason to ignore their advice.
You write that you want to learn to have a proper relationship, and you want to study. Right now, it sounds like you’re not in a dynamic that is facilitating either of these goals.
The perfectionism and procrastination are different types of anxiety and you can absolutely succeed (speaking from experience). I am worried your partner doesn’t understand or respect these challenges and seems to be more concerned with having you around him or doing what he thinks should happen, than seeing you devote your time to investing in yourself. You need support, not discouragement or being made to justify yourself to him.
Who cares. He can't possibly know all the variables. He's young and dumb and playing with fire and you need to be long gone before he gets torched.
It's no different than someone obsessed with dating a partner above a certain height of a certain religion. Preference is preference regardless of how absurd you feel it may be.