I have NO idea why everyone is against you in these comments. You have EVERY right to be upset about this. You had work, it’s not as if you were out partying and refused to get him. Even if he had found other plans, he should have expressed that to you! He should’ve said “I can’t find anyone else, my ex is going to get me and I’m just letting you know so you won’t be uncomfortable.” There are so many ways around this. He didn’t have any friends at all? Any family? She was 100% his absolute last choice? 1 week, 1 month, 2 months, doesn’t matter. The fact that people in these comments are trying to justify this by saying you’re “only 2 months in” is ridiculous. Loyalty and communication starts the second you decide to be exclusive. You should have a serious conversation with him about how this made you feel, and make sure they really are nothing. If you are comfortable after this then stay. You are not wrong here OP. These comments are crazy.
You are welcome. Do not confuse financial support with emotional commitment. It's easy to write a check, it's more difficult to be loyal in action. At only nine months, I'd not enter into any living together situation, new home or not, until you know him better. He can throw that gift right back at you in a hostile way. Or evict you. It often takes years for people to reveal the complete mosaic of who they are and what they value in action.
And this trip has already provided you with more than a hint of where you stand.
This is insane. And crazy selfish tbh. Being with someone for 4 years and NEVER meeting their friends? Talking about “your peace”? Truthfully, she’s probably trying to justify her relationship with you to her friends at this point. I couldn’t imagine being in a relationship with someone for that long and never having them interact with other important people in my life.
As described both of those guys are terrible. Not wanting a guy to use you by having you do everything a girlfriend does, but not calling you one is not being dramatic. A person who tells their potential partner that they have to prove they are 'good enough' is a jerk.
He is a cheater and you are just room mates. Stop cooking for and looking after him in any way and just live your own life, you'll feel so much less hurt & resentful if you give nothing.
Don't bother wasteing time asking ( begging) him to change/speak nicely, just treat anything he says thats not respectfull as silence , literally just pretend he didn't speak until he approaches you politely . He'll soon learn.
I didn’t realize your age. I thought early 20’s. 1. COVID it sounds like he didn’t take it seriously. If he realized how serious it was he would not have done it. 2. His toxic friend. It’s okay to ask him to go LC with her. 3. He needs to learn that the best friendships are the ones you can say no to.
I had two wisdom teeth pulled on the same side and an extra molar just for fun. I scammed a day off of work afterward and then went back as normal. I didn't need the extra day off, and the friend doesn't need a live-in maid/nurse either. Especially since the OP is burning PTO on someone who doesn't need it.
Thank you. Nice to hear a woman's perspective.
I have NO idea why everyone is against you in these comments. You have EVERY right to be upset about this. You had work, it’s not as if you were out partying and refused to get him. Even if he had found other plans, he should have expressed that to you! He should’ve said “I can’t find anyone else, my ex is going to get me and I’m just letting you know so you won’t be uncomfortable.” There are so many ways around this. He didn’t have any friends at all? Any family? She was 100% his absolute last choice? 1 week, 1 month, 2 months, doesn’t matter. The fact that people in these comments are trying to justify this by saying you’re “only 2 months in” is ridiculous. Loyalty and communication starts the second you decide to be exclusive. You should have a serious conversation with him about how this made you feel, and make sure they really are nothing. If you are comfortable after this then stay. You are not wrong here OP. These comments are crazy.
You are welcome. Do not confuse financial support with emotional commitment. It's easy to write a check, it's more difficult to be loyal in action. At only nine months, I'd not enter into any living together situation, new home or not, until you know him better. He can throw that gift right back at you in a hostile way. Or evict you. It often takes years for people to reveal the complete mosaic of who they are and what they value in action.
And this trip has already provided you with more than a hint of where you stand.
Jesus Christ, stand up for yourself.
I would have told her to GTFO of my room with that nonsense.
This is insane. And crazy selfish tbh. Being with someone for 4 years and NEVER meeting their friends? Talking about “your peace”? Truthfully, she’s probably trying to justify her relationship with you to her friends at this point. I couldn’t imagine being in a relationship with someone for that long and never having them interact with other important people in my life.
100% tell the wife. She deserves to know.
As described both of those guys are terrible. Not wanting a guy to use you by having you do everything a girlfriend does, but not calling you one is not being dramatic. A person who tells their potential partner that they have to prove they are 'good enough' is a jerk.
I hope the next guy is better then this two.
He is a cheater and you are just room mates. Stop cooking for and looking after him in any way and just live your own life, you'll feel so much less hurt & resentful if you give nothing.
Don't bother wasteing time asking ( begging) him to change/speak nicely, just treat anything he says thats not respectfull as silence , literally just pretend he didn't speak until he approaches you politely . He'll soon learn.
The guy didn’t randomly bring it up OP brought up marriage.
I didn’t realize your age. I thought early 20’s. 1. COVID it sounds like he didn’t take it seriously. If he realized how serious it was he would not have done it. 2. His toxic friend. It’s okay to ask him to go LC with her. 3. He needs to learn that the best friendships are the ones you can say no to.
I had two wisdom teeth pulled on the same side and an extra molar just for fun. I scammed a day off of work afterward and then went back as normal. I didn't need the extra day off, and the friend doesn't need a live-in maid/nurse either. Especially since the OP is burning PTO on someone who doesn't need it.
Her teeth hurt. She's not an invalid.