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Date: October 29, 2022
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How ironic. You parents are mad at your wife for standing up for you, but also mad at you for not standing up for them. Now they want an apology from her.
You should play the exact same card and demand an apology from them to both your wife and yourself. Once that is done, then yes, show your wife.
OP, this is a summary of what you have written here: You met this woman with a child, who was struggling financially. She has not and will not take the child’s father to court for child support for whatever reason, and has said to you explicitly, that she would feel better about your relationship if she knows she will be financially stable should you break up.
After knowing her a mere 8 weeks (and I say ‘knowing’ loosely because how can you know someone after that short a time?) you have started paying for all of her bills. She works part time ‘on and off’ – what does this even mean? Does she work or not? Why is this on and off and why is this not full time work? Plenty of men and women around the world have children and still manage to provide for themselves and their children. Not easily, but they do it and make sacrifices for their children.
You already plan to marry her but you have been together less than a year and you have not lived together yet. When you are married, she has kindly offered to be a SAHM, to look after a child that’s not yours btw, and you provide EVERYTHING financial.
You also plan to continue paying for her and her child, whom is not yours btw, after you break up, which is already on her mind.
Sound about right? I mean this with kindness and no ill intention, but is there something wrong with you? What’s happened in your life where you feel this is acceptable or okay? Where is your self respect? You deserve better than this, why are you not seeing that. If you are happy to be a doormat and be a cash cow, you go for it, despite every person here strongly advising you against it. But prepare for regret in the future when you wake up and realise this is wrong. If you break up and get into an actual healthy and fulfilling relationship, this would not be acceptable to a new partner. You’ll lose them over this ridiculous decision.
You need to unpack the reasons for why you are falling for this and why you believe this is alright. Do you not have any close family or friends? Have they not been advising you against this too?
If you really want to help her, she needs a reality check. By all means, pay for childcare whilst she trains for a good career so she is set up. Strive for an equal relationship with an equal partner, because right now, it sounds like you are paying for her ‘services’ and her companionship. There are multiple other terms for this type of relationship.
My least favorite concept in social work and psychology: the right to self-determination. You gotta let people make their own choices. All you can do is set boundaries to keep those choices from affecting you.
Just prank him first. Hit him with the ol' “Taze a motherfucker in the parking lot” one.
The “we’re just friends” thing is such a meme at this point I almost think you must be naive to say it unironically. How many thousands of times have I heard that phrase?
Not to mention literally everyone who hears about your living situation will wonder if you’re sleeping with your roommate, and that’s got to make you’re bf uncomfortable all on it’s own. His boundary is fair and you’re putting him in a shit situation.
“When she told me about the gift, I didn’t know how to respond. I was raised to always receive a gift in the spirit it was given, and to be thankful.”
There is no need to call her out.
Just sit her down and explain to her that you love how she knew you loved that band.
But that you have agoraphobia and get health issues in crowds, which is why you are unable to attend the concert.
Which really breaks your heart.
Hug her. Oh and… before entering discussion have a an ready what to.do with your concert ticket. (Send a girlfriend with her, maybe?)
By saying.
Hey. We have different opinions. That will not change. We can either stop talking about that. Or it's over.