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Date: October 5, 2022
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Not really sure why your wages are necessary for this question. If you suspect something, ask him. If you still don't trust him after receiving his answer, move along. If you can't trust someone, why stay with that person?
Unpopular opinion. Mental health issues are never an excuse for being abusive. All relationships have a breaking point and no person should have to be another's personal punching bag. They resent you because you pose a safety risk to their son, that's understandable. They want what's best for him and maybe that isn't you. However, if he chooses to stay then that's between you two and you will both have to face the consequences of your actions.
I’ll take absolute bullshit Reddit posts that are as real as lizard people for 300 please Alex
That's what she complained about in her Facebook rant when she accused both family sides of “spiting her”. She didn't get the most at the end after everyone had performed
Even if he did, it wouldn’t be YOUR fault. Right now it seems He is doing this to get your attention and get you back. If he succeeds in taking his own life that’s on him. It’s not your responsibility to make sure he doesn’t kill himself. That’s what his family and therapy is for. He is using a very common and honestly pathetic manipulation tactic. Old ass trick in the old ass book.
no, absolutely not. I commented elsewhere, we had a nice birthday, deciding to do a fancy dinner another night. But, in lieu of that I got her thoughtful gifts which she loved as well as baked her a cake.
And you shouldn't. At this point, she's almost certainly trickle-truthing you. Every single step of this changes and warps including the scenario as she goes along and more is found out.
She didn't just share her nudes with Ashley she shared her nudes with both Ashley and her husband. I can almost guarantee the husband was part of the plan the entire time on Ashley's side if not your wife's. So she lied, she knows exactly what she did and what she was doing she just planned to coerce and badger you into this.
Absolutely do not have sex with your wife until you take her to the doctors and have a full STD work done, with you on the release form to see the results. I honestly wouldn't be able to trust anything about what's been shared/done without seeing her phone and all the texts.
I'll warn you right now tho, if she deleted the texts and messages, prepare yourself for it to the absolute worse case scenario and lawyer up. She won't be doing it out nervousness or fight/flight but because she knows what's been shared is way worse than what she's told you.
Something else for you to understand, it's not just her cutting ties with Ashley and her assuming all is forgiven. Cutting off Ashley permanently and forever is a bare minimum as well as the STD tests. She can't argue you can trust her, because frankly you can't and you shouldn't let her gaslight you into thinking otherwise.
Yelling at all shouldn't be tolerable. That yelling will turn into something else eventually.
OP. Please. End the relationship.
Two years ago, you informed him your job would come first. This was the priority and you didn't even know if you wanted to date because you knew he would have this issue.
He insisted he would be fine.
You tried to make plans when you were available.
He chose to spend that time with a friend instead.
You accepted this decision, as we are all free to make plans independently.
He whined he wanted to move dinner to another day.
You told him this week would be brutal.
He whined anyway.
You gave in. Agreed on mo day despite working a 24 hour shift.
He was well informed you'd be working 24+ hours
During your 24 hour shift, a child died in a traumatic and disturbing way. You were obviously and rightfully impacted by this event. You informed this guy that a traumatic and upsetting death occurred, and that you were beside yourself emotionally as well as physically and mentally exhausted.
He did not put you first. He did not provide comfort or support. He whined about /dinner/
Despite knowing you were in a bad place mentally, physically exhausting, and grieving an extremely traumatic death of a young child, you STILL made the effort to go to dinner for his sake. You were a measly 7 minutes late.
He threw a tantrum, played games, and ignored you as a result.
You have been honest from the start that you loved your job no matter how nude it was and that this was the priority through and through.
You gave him an out in the event he was capable of self reflection and decided this was not something he could do.
You pointedly gave him options to have your full attention if he was feeling cast aside. He WILLFULLY chose to ignore your options, visit with a friend instead, and then demand your time after he was made aware that you did not have an abundance of it to spare on a very specific set of days.
He set you up to fail.
He knew you were going to be busy. He knew your day was long. He KNEW about the child. He KNEW. And he CHOSE to act like a spoiled brat instead of a mature adult.
He is allowed to feel sad or neglected at your lack of time. He is NOT allowed to punish you for it. He knew what he was signing up for. It's okay if he changed his mind. But it is NOT okay to punish you over that decision. He had options. He could have used his words like a big boy. Instead he dog piled on an already horrific day because he wants you to feel like shit over a dinner he chose to miss. Repeatedly.
This is not a kind, loving, or respectful response. This is the response of an immature person who is not capable of verbalizing their feelings or behaving like a rational, professional, adult.
Don't put up with this type of behavior. Adults don't punish each other. They communicate their needs and if the needs aren't met, they sit down and have the nude conversations. This isn't love. It's manipulation. I'm appalled that he would prioritize a dinner over the death of a child and your emotional well being, but he was perfectly fine prioritizing his friend over that same dinner.
It was never about the dinner. It was about him, and what he wanted. He didn't get what he wanted, so he threw a tantrum. You are not his parent. You are a professional with more important things to worry about than being the emotional punching bag for a stunted adult.
Talk to a lawyer!!
My stomache is saying that this situation/this story has a very foul smell to it.
Yeah maybe it was too late to travel back with the train and a cab would be too expensive, buten then why do they plan the situation in a way that there is the possibilty that she gets stuck at his place. Why didn't they plan in a way so that there is a train to return and maybe another after that just in case?
I do not want to tell you “She is cheating on you 10000%. You need to leave now !1!!1” but there is visible smoke here. So please investigate it to make sure that there is no fire that will burn you.
Go into investigator mode:
-) Think about any other typical sign of cheating. Any form of emotional or physical withdraw, is she all of a sudden safeguarding her phone, has her drastically changed without a good reason, etc.?
-) Think back if there were any situations that were strange or felt of. Think of them out of the persepective of potential cheating. Do they make any more sense when you add that perspective?
-) Inform yourself about this guyfriend … maybe there are some clues if there is something brewing
-) Keep a mental track/ road map when your girlfriend did what? Maybe ask her sometimes what she did at certain dates sometimes later?
If nothing comes up during your check everything might be fine. But prepare for the potential impact that is coming towards you.
Also tell her that this situation was not okay and that you expect from her to plan the next time so that she can return by train.
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(TLDR I think my in-laws traumatized my wife at here Bachelorette party but I am confused on how to ask and scared to ask)
Like I said in the title I think my in-laws traumatized my wife at her Bachelorette party. We have been married for over a year and I still don't know what happened.
Background: My wife and I grew up in a culture where we didn't talk about sex much. (My wife's family is more open about the topic.)
What I know:
My wife says she doesn't remember most of it
Her sisters are the ones that planed and executed the party
My father-in-law says there was too much information (i did not ask him this is what my wife told me)
One of the games was a challenge to see who could deep throat a banana the furthest (i assume most of the games were simmilar)
After the party she began treating me differently.
We have been married for about a year and a half and we have barely had six in that time. (I feel it has something to do with this event, I may be rong though.)
What I'm wondering is how do I even approach this? Should I ask her for more details? Should I ask her family what happened? I am just confused and need advice