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James Shark, 28 y.o.
Location: Europe
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Date: November 30, 2022
He allows his family to abuse you because he can't see that how he is treated is abuse. I would not want my child exposed to his parents or their behavior. It sounds terrifying for a child because it sounds unhinged to me as an adult.
Personally, I'd break up with him and start your custody case in TN. If he wants to be with his parents then he'll be out of state and that can easily turn into very limited custody. You could also move to a family member outside of PA. Anything that would keep grandparents away.
As everyone is saying you need to dump this guy. A serial cheater is just not worth your time. Join the sub r/survivinginfidelity for support and more detailed advice.
Also get this book: Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide. It's a gem.
One of the things the author says is, if you're going to stay then you need to get some kind of benefit from your cheating partner. For example a post-nuptial agreement saying he'll pay you a certain amount of money if he cheats again.
Why don't you try this little experiment; tell your guy you'll take him back if he gives you $5000 (or whatever amount) first. I guarantee his tears will dry, his will to online will return and he'll pack his bags and go all on his own.
You tried to explain it to her and you've done nothing wrong so either she accepts what you've said or you'll have to break up if she can't trust you anymore. That's the long and the short of it.
For someone who is supposedly secure and also barely feels this dynamic is just a little weird for you, you sure are putting up a hell of a fight about it. Unless she has given you an actual reason to think something wrong is going on, knock it off and stop saying you’re not possessive when your statements about her outfit and “seeing him as just another guy” absolutely contradict that.
You let him borrow the card on the condition that he would cancel the card. He made a purchase using the card, albeit in error (or neglect really by not cancelling the card when you reminded him), so he should cough up. Either that or he can pay for your food and hygiene products until you get paid again.
What kind of boyfriend would leave you without any money for FOOD when it’s his fault you don’t have the money?
Of course you must go. What do they have to hide? Sounds suspicious to me as though they all are interested in driving work liaisons. Dangerous too.