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Jane, 25 y.o.
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Date: April 8, 2023
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I stay this with love, and as a dude. Fuck his ego. You do not owe attention to a man who is trying to get validation by making advances while he’s involved, and he certainly isn’t entitled to you being nice about it either. If I were you, I’d just say “look, I know you have a long term gf, I’m not into that, and I’m not into a guy who sneaks around, so stop flirting with me and go home to your girlfriend like a respectable man. I’m not attracted to guys who cheat.” That’s about all he deserves.
I came to say all this. This dude is being much worse than he seems to think here :/
I'd get rid of #5. I have close friends that I go to them with for problem solving or getting their perspective. I think it's healthy to discuss problems with other people and get their outside ideas about something which you can take as advice or not heed at all. I only discuss problems with trusted friends.
In general, I'd just say every decision you make, consider the other person. If they were right next to you, would you make the same decision?
I don't really understand #3. Your partner is not everything. You shouldn't be looking for everything. They should be an addition on top of your everything.
Good!
Is there a way, that they build two seperate apartments in the house?
Holy enabling, Batman.
You've just got the whole laundry list of diagnoses to make excuses for her, dontcha?
Shiny spine. Get one. Just because psychology has words to explain her conditions doesn't mean they get excused.
She is a mediocre and shitty human being. You have nothing with her, right? No kids? No mortgage? It would be a clean break?
The only challenge you have is breaking your enabling addiction and standing up straight.