She said she never brought a dude home and her friend got mad when she got a little peck on the cheek. It’s not like he can hear or see them have sex and he even gets mad when they’re just calling and talking to each other which seems to indicate there’s more going on beyond her just having sex
Yeah I mean but you didn’t stop it? You need to grow a back bone and do 1 of 2 things:
Set your boundaries and STICK TO THEM!!! That means you go sit him down right now and say hey if you want to be with me sexually you will wear a condom. No condoms no sex- then follow through. He doesn’t want to put it on? Then say ok we aren’t having sex, get up out of bed or wherever you are literally END the encounter.
Break up with his ass because he’s old enough to understand you had a weak boundary, and instead of doing the right thing(listening to you) he chose to push it and you did not stop him. That would be enough for me to end the relationship but this is not about me.
If you can’t do either of those things please get help. You need to learn how stand up for yourself- it’s a crucial part of life.
Hahaha yeah she would never cheat on you because she's just going to break up with you/ take a break from the relationship when she wants someone else and will come crawling back to you when she's had her fun. You're the stable one, the backup plan, the one that when she's done having all of her fun you'll accept her with open arms.
You need to explain to this clown that people who exclusively sleep with each other and have romantic feelings to each other are generally referred to as boyfriend and girlfriend, or something along those lines, in the society you are both living and that he should stop behaving like a 5 year old.
This is one of those moments in your life where you have to be totally selfish in this decision. What he wants doesn’t matter. What your family wants or thinks doesn’t matter. What do you want?? What do you really want? Can you get that from him? Or can you not? You have to look inward and decide what the rest of your life is going to be. Make this decision for yourself and only yourself.
Make a chore list with due dates and who is responsible for what. Post it. If his chores aren't done, he doesn't get the dinner you made, or sex, or anything else until they are done.
I suggested he goes to therapy. He said that his mom helps him through his issues when he talks to her (she’s in Korea so she’s not here). I told him that his mom is so lovely and sweet but he needs more help than just talking to his mom
it’s selfish for me to want to go on vacation during spring break?
no it's not. The selfish part was not planning you vacation with your SO and making plans that you would both enjoy and could do together especially when you said you guys barely saw each other
Fuck, man! The 'depressing title' hit so close to home I thought it's WWIII and I hid in the basement. Last summer my relationship with my partner ended after little more then two decades, it got to a really bad place for me and I ended it because I just couldn't do it. DB since maybe 15 years back. I am 41 now, so I'm thinking that if you end up breaking up, there's more time for you to start over. We were both at fault, still, I cannot seem to be able to forgive myself for what and how I did things, and even more for those I haven't done. I gradually got too depressed and hopeless, to the point where I just didn't want to exist anymore. I told her at some point that I really need some help, but I just went on for maybe a year after. The thing is, the lack of reaction to that really broke me like nothing ever before. It was clear to me that my soulmate maybe resented me a bit or we were already too apart….sorry man, I kind of lost my train of thought. It's weird, because my brain wants to blame her, hate her, but I will always love her and maybe be in love with her. I know my post is all over, I'll try to get back to it. The only thing I can say is make sure, try everything to know what is going on with her, make her see the future of you, because if there's any chance to get back on track, you need to take it.
It’s better than being jaded and hardened like I am, i never cry nor I deal with being emotionally neglected as a kid. My boyfriend cries a lot and tells me how he feels every five minutes. I wish I could do that too but I’m just dead inside
when me and him do play games, it's usually fun. the phone sex is good. it's fun to talk about the future with him.
She said she never brought a dude home and her friend got mad when she got a little peck on the cheek. It’s not like he can hear or see them have sex and he even gets mad when they’re just calling and talking to each other which seems to indicate there’s more going on beyond her just having sex
Yeah I mean but you didn’t stop it? You need to grow a back bone and do 1 of 2 things:
Set your boundaries and STICK TO THEM!!! That means you go sit him down right now and say hey if you want to be with me sexually you will wear a condom. No condoms no sex- then follow through. He doesn’t want to put it on? Then say ok we aren’t having sex, get up out of bed or wherever you are literally END the encounter.
Break up with his ass because he’s old enough to understand you had a weak boundary, and instead of doing the right thing(listening to you) he chose to push it and you did not stop him. That would be enough for me to end the relationship but this is not about me.
If you can’t do either of those things please get help. You need to learn how stand up for yourself- it’s a crucial part of life.
Good luck in the future!
“It's a dangerous thing to mistake speaking without thought for speaking the truth.” Benoit Blanc
Hahaha yeah she would never cheat on you because she's just going to break up with you/ take a break from the relationship when she wants someone else and will come crawling back to you when she's had her fun. You're the stable one, the backup plan, the one that when she's done having all of her fun you'll accept her with open arms.
You need to explain to this clown that people who exclusively sleep with each other and have romantic feelings to each other are generally referred to as boyfriend and girlfriend, or something along those lines, in the society you are both living and that he should stop behaving like a 5 year old.
OP this is the comment
This is one of those moments in your life where you have to be totally selfish in this decision. What he wants doesn’t matter. What your family wants or thinks doesn’t matter. What do you want?? What do you really want? Can you get that from him? Or can you not? You have to look inward and decide what the rest of your life is going to be. Make this decision for yourself and only yourself.
Good luck.
Make a chore list with due dates and who is responsible for what. Post it. If his chores aren't done, he doesn't get the dinner you made, or sex, or anything else until they are done.
I suggested he goes to therapy. He said that his mom helps him through his issues when he talks to her (she’s in Korea so she’s not here). I told him that his mom is so lovely and sweet but he needs more help than just talking to his mom
it’s selfish for me to want to go on vacation during spring break?
no it's not. The selfish part was not planning you vacation with your SO and making plans that you would both enjoy and could do together especially when you said you guys barely saw each other
Are you claiming that masterbating is disrespecting your partner?
With no reciprocation, everyday without fail even if you didn’t feel in the mood?
Fuck, man! The 'depressing title' hit so close to home I thought it's WWIII and I hid in the basement. Last summer my relationship with my partner ended after little more then two decades, it got to a really bad place for me and I ended it because I just couldn't do it. DB since maybe 15 years back. I am 41 now, so I'm thinking that if you end up breaking up, there's more time for you to start over. We were both at fault, still, I cannot seem to be able to forgive myself for what and how I did things, and even more for those I haven't done. I gradually got too depressed and hopeless, to the point where I just didn't want to exist anymore. I told her at some point that I really need some help, but I just went on for maybe a year after. The thing is, the lack of reaction to that really broke me like nothing ever before. It was clear to me that my soulmate maybe resented me a bit or we were already too apart….sorry man, I kind of lost my train of thought. It's weird, because my brain wants to blame her, hate her, but I will always love her and maybe be in love with her. I know my post is all over, I'll try to get back to it. The only thing I can say is make sure, try everything to know what is going on with her, make her see the future of you, because if there's any chance to get back on track, you need to take it.
It’s better than being jaded and hardened like I am, i never cry nor I deal with being emotionally neglected as a kid. My boyfriend cries a lot and tells me how he feels every five minutes. I wish I could do that too but I’m just dead inside
you should call her and break up with her. She’s trash and you deserve better. You will find better.