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King Yaka, 24 y.o.
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms King Yaka
Date: October 23, 2022
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I totally get it. Toxic/abusive relationships can be so addictive. I like the metaphor of food stability — if most days you’re starving, then the day you get to eat a sandwich, that’s the best damn sandwich you’ve ever tasted. It doesn’t matter if it’s objectively just a boring old pb&j, after a period of starvation, it tastes like the king’s own dinner. But if you’re eating three square meals a day, every day, then you start kinda taking food for granted. Boring old pb&j doesn’t excite you anymore.
In that same way, after a period of abuse, a simple compliment from your abuser will have you walking on air. But in a secure relationship, that same compliment just doesn’t get you high in the same way, because you’re made to feel safe and wanted all the time. This is a well-known phenomenon and you are not alone — far from it — in feeling this way. It’s part of the reason therapy is so recommended after exiting an abusive situation, so you can get your normal meter recalibrated.
I also overthought on every potential new romantic interest after my own toxic relationship ended. It’s probably normal, but it’s also counterproductive. Just keep recentering yourself and asking yourself “Am I happy right now?” You don’t need to know if this is your forever person. You don’t need to know if passion will develop. That’s what dating is meant to help you find out. Yes, some people get very infatuated very quickly, and that’s fun — but there’s nothing wrong with needing more time to let someone into your heart, and in fact I would argue that puts you at an advantage in the dating game. If this guy never wins your love, then you can move on — but maybe he will. Passion can strike at any point in a relationship. (The classic example of this is an arranged marriage, where people sometimes fall in love years after their wedding!)
I think the harshness comes in reaction to her comments, not the original post.
She said she could have taken time off work and would have if she knew he would otherwise have to use his ex.
So she is able to take time off work, but only when she sees a need to, and not when he needs her to.
I was in a way hoping to confirm my feelings without saying it myself. Thank you.
Excuses, excuses, excuses.
leave him alone.
I think you have a sex addiction
I never thought I'd have the reaction to cheating that I'm having now, which is knowing what to do but being basically numb.
I should be pissed because she's told me numerous times that if she was looking for / found someone else she would tell me. She hasn't said anything except this guy's a photographer which I don't even fully believe because he doesn't have a public portfolio.
If she tries to twist around her own words and claim she told me about him, just not fully, I might flip out not even gonna lie. We literally talked about breaking up or not peacefully not even a week ago and she opted to stay together. What's the fucking point of this.
i feel like you continuously answered your question. he seems manipulative, he turns the “inconvenience” of you having feelings into something he can get attention for while getting to ignore what you are upset about.
i don’t think you should stay with him, and i think you know that. you should cut your losses and move on. it’s better for you in the long run. 🙂
Yes.
This can happen when you haven’t been having sex regularly or you haven’t had sex in a while. Nothing to worry about, just keep practicing and it should get better.