That’s what I thought and it makes sense, but he’s the one asking me to still hang out. I was prepared for him to want to spend less time with me or only hang out in a group setting but he still wants to spend time with me alone, he’s just being really awful to me when we hang out now.
He’s still an addict and there’s no healthy way to consume something that you’re addicted to. Addicts brains have literally been wired differently. Look up the psychology behind addiction. Even cutting back to 3x a week or not doing it at work, that’s not normal and the fact he has to go to such lengths proves he will never be able to consume it in a “decent way” he needs to completely stop.
He isn't gaslighting. He is defining what he thinks establishes a Jewish identity, sufficient to let him and his children on-line as Jews among other Jews, religious or not. Let's look at each part, first from his POV, then yours.
He considers circumcision little more than a tattoo, the ancient Jewish marker of Identity.
He wants no pork “in the home.” Keep pork in the home, lose the Identity.
The Torah is the historic chronicle of his ancestors, which all Jews share, religious or not.
The world of non-Jews isn't so fussy about Identity. One Jewish ancestor is usually enough for a non-Jew to identify his neighbor as a Jew, even when that neighbor was born in, raised in, and fully practices another religion. This makes some, such as your BF, feel like outsiders or outcasts EXCEPT among their own kind, and only when they establish a shared Identity WITH their own kind. This is what he thinks he's doing, and why he's asking such things of you.
What you've expressed here is revulsion for what you consider genital mutilation, dietary dictatorship, and religious indoctrination. If you can't see things his way, I can't blame you for breaking up, and I'm afraid you'd best get it over with. Sorry about the 1.5 years. Live! and learn.
Please do not lead her on any longer. You talk about her like a hobby.
That’s what I thought and it makes sense, but he’s the one asking me to still hang out. I was prepared for him to want to spend less time with me or only hang out in a group setting but he still wants to spend time with me alone, he’s just being really awful to me when we hang out now.
He’s still an addict and there’s no healthy way to consume something that you’re addicted to. Addicts brains have literally been wired differently. Look up the psychology behind addiction. Even cutting back to 3x a week or not doing it at work, that’s not normal and the fact he has to go to such lengths proves he will never be able to consume it in a “decent way” he needs to completely stop.
Unffortunately sometimes it does tell you that, but its less likely
He isn't gaslighting. He is defining what he thinks establishes a Jewish identity, sufficient to let him and his children on-line as Jews among other Jews, religious or not. Let's look at each part, first from his POV, then yours.
He considers circumcision little more than a tattoo, the ancient Jewish marker of Identity.
He wants no pork “in the home.” Keep pork in the home, lose the Identity.
The Torah is the historic chronicle of his ancestors, which all Jews share, religious or not.
The world of non-Jews isn't so fussy about Identity. One Jewish ancestor is usually enough for a non-Jew to identify his neighbor as a Jew, even when that neighbor was born in, raised in, and fully practices another religion. This makes some, such as your BF, feel like outsiders or outcasts EXCEPT among their own kind, and only when they establish a shared Identity WITH their own kind. This is what he thinks he's doing, and why he's asking such things of you.
What you've expressed here is revulsion for what you consider genital mutilation, dietary dictatorship, and religious indoctrination. If you can't see things his way, I can't blame you for breaking up, and I'm afraid you'd best get it over with. Sorry about the 1.5 years. Live! and learn.
“Oh hey, wife's friend. Man, what a day at work. My head is killing me, I'm going to go lay down.”
Bam Done. You don't look like a weiner and everyone's content