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Kristina, 25 y.o.
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Date: April 12, 2023
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100% cheating. I mean, take a step back and really think about it. You caught her with a dating app looking for a woman to hook up with. That itself is a huge giveaway. Then you talked to her about it, she “uninstalled” it, and you found it yourself and uninstalled it for her. There's literally nothing to hide at this point. She was caught multiple times, but you're helping her by uninstalling it for her. I recommend reading this post out loud to yourself. If you find yourself cringing as the words come out, there's your answer. There's literally no excuse for her to even have the app. The fact that you caught her lying is just further confirmation.
You say he practices good hygiene but what about his clothing? A family member of mine sometimes reeks and it has nothing to do with showering and everything to do with the fact he hasn’t cleaned his clothes. Both situations are incredibly frustrating though.
As an ADHDer married to an ADHDer, I’d say it doesn’t even require planning (which we both suck at). It just requires mutual respect and love.
A person who respects and loves you cares about your enjoyment. They don’t expect you to constantly do things for them without reciprocating, in the bedroom or otherwise
Regardless of you believing if there’s an affair or not, idk how you trust your wife again after all that. She has lied about some pretty big things and that’s just what you’ve found out about. What’s she been hiding throughout your relationship?
I have said that to him during the discussions we’ve had, he says he will and then he doesn’t. The only update that I will usually get is if they are going to a different location than they originally started at.
He has his roommate to help him, if you think he's actually going to do something then you can ring help for him. As harsh as it sounds he's not your problem in the long term, staying with him is just continue to continue to hurt you and he won't change.
Ask him, if another guy sexually assaulted you, called you a bitch and choked you …but he was drunk. Would he be responsible? Would your boyfriend be mad?
By his logic, he shouldn't be because if the other guy was drunk and couldn't be blamed for his actions.
While I would love to know what he has to say to that. I don't even think you should speak to this man again. You are not safe.