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Lamecracker(:<3, 20 y.o.
Location: England, United Kingdom
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Date: October 23, 2022
Abusers don't ever change. Do yourself a favor and stop giving this woman chances.
People are being pretty unfair. The behavior you’re describing is dog zoomies. It’s normal dog behavior. Animals get excited too. Of course he’s going to be excited when he goes outside.
You need to address the underlying mental health issues of your fiancé. This isn’t about the dog. It’s about her threatening to take away your child if you don’t do exactly as she says.
You had the dog before you started dating her. Pets are a package deal. If it was a dealbreaker she shouldn’t have continued to date you, let alone choose to have a child with you. I would understand if you randomly got a dog six months ago without her input but that’s not the case.
You need to have a talk with her and say the ultimatums are not sustainable. That you’re alarmed she got rid of her own pet and that her mental health issues are more severe than she realizes.
If there’s any ultimatum it’s that she see a doctor / OBGYN and find out what’s going on. She should see a therapist as well.
See if the venue has any security. Tell them that it is a black tie event and if he arrives in costume, not to give him entrance. They could tell him that “part of their job is to ensure an enjoyable time for the wedding couple. Since the couple have requested a black tie event, you won't be admitted unless you change.”
I personally think it would be worth paying extra for that. His family will not be able to just let him in.
Also, people often have both wedding party members and other roles such as ushers in a wedding. Consider having some of your bigger friends act as ushers and give them the same directions.
The point is, you have politely expressed your very reasonable desires, it is your wedding, and it should not fall on you personally to be the bad guy. You should be busy celebrating and marrying. Professionals at the venue and your close friends should be tasked with handling this.
I feel like that would make me come off as too jealous no?
I stopped reading when you said he was abu…err testing you.
This man is bad for you.
I'm sorry to hear that you are going through this. It's understandable to feel hurt and betrayed when discovering that your partner has been consuming porn, especially if it goes against your personal values or makes you feel inadequate in some way.
However, it's important to remember that watching porn is a common behavior for many people and doesn't necessarily mean that your boyfriend doesn't find you attractive or doesn't enjoy your sex life together. People can have a variety of reasons for consuming porn, and it's not always related to dissatisfaction with their current partner.
That being said, it's also important for partners to communicate openly and honestly about their sexual desires and boundaries. If you feel uncomfortable with your boyfriend's porn consumption, it's important to express that to him and have an open and honest conversation about it. It's also important to address any trust issues that may have arisen from previous incidents, such as him having Tinder on his phone.
Ultimately, it's up to you to decide what you are comfortable with in a relationship and whether or not you can trust your partner. It may be helpful to seek out counseling or therapy to work through these issues together.
Someone who isn’t trustworthy doesn’t get trust in return.