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So, if you did actually forget about the video and it was an honest mistake then obviously you did nothing wrong, but as someone with bpd I can tell you that seeing something like that would be naked to get past. Yes we realize that our partners had a past before us. However we don't want to think about it and we definitely don't want to see videos of them in bed together. I can't speak for your girlfriend, but I can say it would be extremely very hot for me to get over seeing that and I may not be able to. One thing that does help me though, if I'm comparing myself to an ex, is to remind myself that I also have a past. Maybe that's stupid or weird but it makes me feel better to know that it's not one sided? Idk if that makes sense but yeah.
I wouldn't be ok with it. He is using her as emotional support for something he should be going to you about. If you two are having problems, you should be talking it over together. There should be no running to opposite gendered friends to seek sympathy and validation.
Also, I notice you say he threatens to complain about you to his friend – that means he knows he shouldn't be doing it but he sees it triggers an emotional response from you so now he has weaponized his own crappy actions. That is abuse. ]
Probably wouldn't stick this one out. It's not going to improve.
Wel the initial cause was you were way too passive In you boundaries. Tons of these stories start out with a weak dude saying I wanted her to have friends so she goes out all the time. Cheaters only need time and opportunity and you willfully allowed both. Learn from this and move on and ghost her. She is complete trash. Crying, begging or whining about it will only make her lose more respect for you.
The idea that every man should get a paternity test is definitely not the norm in most countries. It would make me incredibly uncomfortable and even heartbroken to have my partner project such extreme distrust onto me over something so serious. Honestly, this is a massive red flag that he may be the one being unfaithful.
i'm so embarrassed about it. i feel like the school counselor will laugh about it or something. it's me against nearly the whole school 🙁 i just want the video taken down, i can handle the other things.
Ya gotta tell her what you're expecting after the “oh ok.” Maybe “nothing” is what she would like when she feels like that. Explain what would help you when you're seeking connection — what does that look like? What would help? Tell her.
You just said they are men's sunglasses. He probably got them for himself.
He wouldn't get men's sunglasses for a woman if that's what you're thinking.
What type of relationship do you have to where you wanna go and possibly ruin your Christmas gift by snooping in his car?
“Others” I would have assumed he got gifts for you or the kids but didn't wanna tell you about it so it would be a surprise (he doesn't normally do that).
She has a girlfriend. And I don’t know if it’s legal
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It's more about calling a bluff, I think
Well just keep the lines of communication open
Long relationships are built on the backs of uncomfortable conversations
lmao, troll.
? I've been thereeeeee.
??? Say goodbye. If he needs time to work on himself that means he “needs” space to do it vs taking relationship level time and emotional labor from you.
If you're not ready to cut and run. Decrease involvement slowly. Go hang with your other friends!
end this
I agree for the most part but this is really her decision. OP is 22 and this relationship may not last and she may not be certain about her own desire to be a parent yet.
Actually it's a type 2 diabetes, and the lung cancer reason is unknown based on what she says.
And to be honest i am not searching for an excuse to leave her, nor i don't want to make obvious mistake…. i don't want to make stupid decision too. That's why I wanted to hear others perspective on the issue.
What would you do, if you are in such situation? What would you decide personally???
Yep, the more pathetic and weenier you act, the more likely she is to take pity on you lmao
And in this situation, pity is your friend
If he’s cheating just leave.
Lmao the jealousy ? you confessed your feelings and he let you down kindly, the friendship line is just that: a line. If he was in love with you he would be with you.
You’re too old for this behavior.
He didn’t choose you. And be won’t.
Find someone who will.
He’s a big boy. Leave his parents out of your own manufactured drama.
This happens pretty often. It can be weird in some situations but if there’s no longer a client/patient relationship then there is nothing to report.
It doesn’t make it any less of a deal breaker.
Yeah, the holiday in itself I wouldn’t flag up as alarming if it weren’t for all the bullshit that comes with him as well!