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Date: October 30, 2022
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Maaaan girl please end it. You are so young! I wasted 4 years of my life with an equally apathetic guy from the ages of 19-23 and it destroyed my confidence. I’m now with a guy who makes me feel like the most special girl in the world. These men are still out there!
I think events like this can be VERY important life lessons. This has shown you who he really is. It might have taken you years to notice otherwise.
Some studies have also linked spanking (esp in girls) with being more likely to suffer from sexual abuse later in life
'He screamed at me that he compromised and married someone not in his league so his kids would have a good mother'
So I could tell before I got to this bit that he had married you to try to lure his kids away from their mother. I will say this – you are way out of his league. He is so beneath contempt and you know why his kids don't want to spend Christmas with him.
There is no coming back from this for your relationship. There is a coming back from this for your self esteem. You sound utterly lovely. You are thoughtful, kind and caring. He is none of those things
Dude….if a woman taking birth control scares you (something she’d have to do every day at the same time), perhaps you shouldn’t be dating
He's definitely abusive.
No, but if you're telling people who don't know what it means that you're having a 'sex reveal' party, they'll be very creeped out (unless they're into that).
Thou can kindly fornicate thyself
Yeah well men masquerading as women to try to be “better women” is horseshit. Afab… Just fyi no one is assigned anything at birth. They are observed as.
You definitely answered your initial questions and I agree, I don’t see you guys being friends. Go enjoy yourself, you admitted you’re not ready to be tied down yet and the age difference issues. There’s someone out there closer to your age that is established. Just have fun for now!
I do try to correct mistakes I make, usually when it’s pointed out where I’m going wrong, I fix the issue and do things right. The problem is that the initial thing I did wrong isn’t let go. It’s held against me any time there’s a similar argument. The thing I did wrong is only done right now, because she had to point out that it was wrong before, and no amount of trying to do the right thing will remedy that.
Tell him to stop talking to you all the time and to start talking to a therapist!
Seriously, you can't fix this guy's problems. You can't give him enough attention to satisfy him because apparently 24/7 isn't enough for him. It's not your job in life to make him happy or to feel safe. You weren't put on this earth to talk to him or relieve his anxiety 24/7.
He's not sweet. I've never heard of a real-life princess held hostage by phone. You're being emotionally manipulated. He controls ALL your time to be with “him” so he can ensure you're not spending ANY TIME with anyone else. That's creepy AF.
The best thing you can do for yourself is text him (don't talk to him, he's manipulative) that this relationship does not work for you any longer and you want a different relationship long-term. THEN BLOCK HIM everywhere and move on. You should get some therapy, too, or at least read some self-help books to understand WHY you're in an emotionally abusive relationship.
If you marry him, you are actively accepting this life that you have now. Nothing is going to magically change so why hang your hopes on a dream when reality is staring you in the face.
You’re not overreacting in the slightest and the hygiene issue alone is enough to nope out of there. Let alone being his mommy? Gross.
This man doesn’t care about your comfort and is happy to keep his low-effort, high-reward life going. Why wouldn’t he? He’s getting all the benefits of your labour without lifting a finger. Call it off and choose yourself.