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  1. By “went out of control” you mean you raped her, right?

    I mean, it's not like this is new to you. If she tells you over and over “don't initiate sex” and you do anyway, how is that not you violating her expressly telling you she does not consent to it? I.e. a sexual assault. A lot of women, when someone they care about disregards their boundaries, try to rationalize it because they can't take the heartache of having loved someone who would treat them so vilely. Tell me though, in you brain, how do you justify ever initiating after she tells you you that you do not have consent to do so? How to you make your mind think that's anything other than sexual assault, even if in her broken state she didn't fight you?

    I mean…if you don't like her boundaries, break up. But “I couldn't control my hormones” “I just got a little out of hand” “She gave mixed signals even though she explicitly told me not to do it” and “she didn't physically fight me so I didn't know it was rape” are all like page one of the rapist excuse handbook.

  2. Influencers lie all the time. Your girlfriend's got her head screwed on right.

    You should break up with her, I'm sure in time she'll realise what a dodged bullet this relationship would be.

  3. If possible I dont want to divorce, we own a very beautiful home in a very good area and I do still like her.

  4. You mentioned a new born, is there a chance this is post partum depression? It's not an excuse for her terrible and aggressive behavior but it may be the reason. If so, it's likely with help she can stop these outbursts and you could hopefully avoid divorce and have a healthy home life for your family.

  5. I really want to work through

    You gave her a 2nd chance and she fucked someone less than a month later and lied about it.

    Have some self respect and call an attorney.

  6. basically whenever she rants to me abt smtg. i js listen and thats all i did for the past few days cos i assume she just wants someone to hear her out. and usually she rants to me at night. or sometimes shes sad or mad at smtg she dry texts me which is obvious that she is not okay. so what i would do is ask her if shes okay and then she says she is okay (but shes not). so when she says that i js assume she fine when shes clearly not. Im still at fault here cos I know shes not fine. So she gets lazy n says goodnight instead of the usual goodnight she says when she fine. and i js let her be even though she dry text me and said goodnight the dry way and js let her sleep. i js let her go to sleep instead of asking if shes rly fine and comforting her. honestly its a bare minimum i failed to do.

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