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Date: October 10, 2022
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When a person is hiv+ and takes meds they become what's called undetectable, meaning it isn't detected in the blood, and cannot sexually pass the infection.
Thanks. Can I ask how his awkward has manifested in the past or what that looks like?
Also, I think I must have edited my comment as you wrote your response. Do you get the sense he was lying about the conversation you had with your friend about her sex life, or does it seem plausible you did talk with her and forgot? Has he ever told you something happened before and you don't think it did?
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Not being able to feel regular sexual stimulation or orgasm is a pretty major side effect. Is this the first combination of meds you doctor has tried? You should definitely bring it up with them and try to find a better combination for you, this level of sexual dysfunction is not fine and it's having an effect on other important parts of your life.
I still hold the belief that live bullying needs to be addressed in a calm, respectful but firm way
If bullies could be reasoned with in a calm, respectful manner, they wouldn't be bullies.
Lmao. Are you seriously expecting a grown mad to get in a pointless argument over a game because someone said bad words to you and you want your honor defended? Don't be so childish.
[CONTINUED] They don’t know where she will go. She is refusing to talk to any of the family. He started going to family therapy for people with family members with schizophrenia. While talking to other families he’s heard some of them struggling with this for 40+ years. It’s very very hot because they can’t just make her take medicine. They have to gain rights over her decision making. Neither of his parents want to go to court to retain rights over her decisions. At the same token he is the only one who stays in the house with her. While his mom goes to work and his dad lives 30 minutes away. So I started to hear less from him this past week. I just wanted to know what was happening. I was concerned for him and his family. When we would talk I could just hear the pain in his voice every time. When we would talk he would just cry and tell me that he is hurting me. Which he has been hurting me. Not hearing from your partner all day hurts. Waiting for my daily phone call has been my new routine. We agreed at the beginning of the relationship to call each other once a day. In his defense he was raised by people who don’t believe in sharing your feelings. A lot of the time I feel that he self soothe’s and emotionally shuts down. Since being with him I’ve never seen him ask for anyone’s advice or help. The problems he has currently are consuming him to the point of no return. He can’t focus on work, is always depressed, and can’t talk to me. I’m afraid he is going to lose everything he loves in his life. This week he told me that he couldn’t do this to me anymore. He realizes that he has been emotionally absent. He always tells me that I don’t deserve this. I have been a very loyal, kind and generous girlfriend. Even though I get frustrated at times and confused I try to be patient. I have tried to convey to him that I understand he won’t offer much to me emotionally during this time. I tell him that no matter what I’ll wait for him to get better. I don’t want him to be stressed over this relationship. I have made it clear that all I expect is communication. When I say this he cries and tells me that’s the bare minimum. I try to tell him that he can talk to me, and that I would do anything for him. Lately when I offer to see him in person he says no. It is only a 4 hour train ride and I just want to see him in person so badly. He told me that he does see a future with me. Just at this time he needs to get back to himself. He has proposed the idea of taking a break so we can get back to being happy. Neither of us know anything about breaks. To me I personally have always felt that breaks aren’t helpful. I see it as an excuse to sleep with other people. My boyfriend isn’t like most men though. The man I know values sex and doesn’t sleep around. I know he holds onto his pain and truly does need to seek professional help. I know he isn’t interested in anyone right now. I know he wants to be a good boyfriend but simply can’t. I’ve told him it’s crucial he talks to someone about this. I have been trying to get him to go to therapy now for weeks. After he said that proposal about the break I then proposed we talk to each other on the phone on the weekends at least. I figured during the week we could both work on ourselves, and focus on our goals. I too have been affected by our relationship in the work department. I just can’t seem to focus on anything. I figured if we abide to these terms for awhile we can get better. I think not talking during the week will help us. He’s very much confused. I’m just afraid I’m going to lose him forever. He means the world to me and I hate seeing him go through this. To him he is failing in every sector of his life, and releasing me feels like it’s the best option. In reality if I go a month without talking to him I don’t believe I could go back to him. I know if I can’t talk to him for that long I’ll drive myself crazy. To the point where I become emotionally numb and have no feelings. I foresee myself being devastated, and tremendously depressed. I don’t want to be someone’s option for when they feel better. I’m willing to stick with him even if it means he isn’t himself. I just don’t understand him anymore and I’m very confused. We went from being deeply in love to him not wanting to see me. Then he says he wants to see me badly but cannot do it to me. I don’t know why he feels so much guilt. I don’t understand why he can’t just work on himself, get back to being productive and be my bf. This past year I wasn’t mentally myself due to an imbalanced hormone issue. He took it upon himself to do a lot of research and find a way to help me. Even though I was going through a dark depression he was still there. I blame his childhood for him not being able to talk about his emotions. Now as an adult he isolates himself, and won’t talk to anyone about what he’s going through. If you’ve read this far thank you. I just want to save my relationship and help save my best friend. I’m not sure what the right choice is. Do I stop trying to make this work? Or do I continue to fight for us, and maybe even go to his city unexpectedly…
Probably should have specified in the OP but they've only been playing games together live, not in person.
Also, we are very close to both the guy and girl ex-couple, in and of itself them playing games together live for hours is not a problem in my eyes. After talking to her about it, she said she feels it's different because it is those two specifically. She says she would be okay with me doing the same with the girl from the couple. Not sure about that, though, and I would feel weird doing it.
So I don't think it's as cut and dry as the two examples you mentioned.
It’s really sad people can’t just have conversations any more without it ending in a breakup
I’m trying to see if I can get at least the internet out in my name since that’s the account I can’t even get into to pay. I can pay the lights off my paper bill. None are in my name so it’s harder to really do anything. I thought of moving home for now but I live! 3 hours from family. I moved for college, graduated last fall and just got a decent job I don’t want to lose by moving home because of this.
I am looking into other housing but I have our two pets as well I have to consider. It’s really all a big mess I’m cleaning up alone and it’s so stressful and hot.