That’s not an good comparison though. A more apt comparison would be if I know my partner got an STI from a past partner, and now requires we both be tested for STI every 6 months, would I take that boundary as them not trusting me? My answer would be no. I know that they would feel the same way with ANY partner. Why would I take it as a trust issue between us? It doesn’t make an logical sense. People do things all the time to protect themselves from harm they’ve experienced in life. It’s called learning and risk mitigation.
Most of what you described are not signs of an early pregnancy but since you have a positive urine test (even a faint line is considered a positive result) you should get a blood test asap.
You need to take this in the stride of that you didn't screw up. She did. She took a chance and got caught red-handed. Her cheating on you is NEVER healthy for a long-term relationship. Stop thinking with your schlong and think with your noggin. And get tested for STDs while you're at it. You don't deserve to get used and abused like this. You deserve better.
What does your therapist suggest you do when you are “unable to stop” and spiralling into a PTSD episode? What grounding techniques have they suggested you try and what safety mechanisms do you have for feeling secure in this situation?
My partner has repeatedly threatened to leave me when we get into a big fight…. probably 5 times in the last 6 months.
That is pretty toxic, if their immediate threat in an argument is to leave you. Do you two have a couples' counsellor that you are working with on communication and arguments?
How can I create a path forward together with this person if I know I will make a mistake crossing their important boundary at least on rare occasions?
No one is perfect and no one communicates perfectly at all times. Yes, you need to respect the “stop” but your partner needs to respect how very hot you try and that to threaten to leave you five times in six months is pretty toxic, and I would argue, manipulative, since it seems they are trying to manage your behaviours with threats. Not OK.
It’s really vast majority?! I’m so ignorant of this statistic. I read my porn anyway but will absolutely make sure not to visit the free video sites ever again. It breaks my heart to learn this.
Ah yes, because one should expect to be disrespected by their partner not once, but twice, and accept it. Fuck out of here with you “anything goes because it’s just dancing” bullshit lmao
I think the marked difference people are saying the tipping point is lies between without physical materials(photos) thinking of IRL folks/friends you may have a crush on in a completely open manner and having literal photos used of someone that never consented to them being used like that and the act itself being done in a secretive manner. Even the act of it being conducted discreetly would let me know that the person who is doing it didn't even themselves believe their thoughts/actions to be something to be done without shame or guilt. ?? Idk, maybe I'm thinking too deeply about it ? but that would be my thoughts!!
When it comes to actual sex acts, there is not really any “normal”. I'm sure some people give/receive oral sex every day if that's what works for them! What is most definitely NOT normal is how he is pressuring you and guilt-tripping you into doing something you don't want to do. He is manipulative and coercive, that's not okay
I take care of everything with him. I pay for daycare and watch him the whole time he is home. I provide for his every need.
That’s not an good comparison though. A more apt comparison would be if I know my partner got an STI from a past partner, and now requires we both be tested for STI every 6 months, would I take that boundary as them not trusting me? My answer would be no. I know that they would feel the same way with ANY partner. Why would I take it as a trust issue between us? It doesn’t make an logical sense. People do things all the time to protect themselves from harm they’ve experienced in life. It’s called learning and risk mitigation.
Most of what you described are not signs of an early pregnancy but since you have a positive urine test (even a faint line is considered a positive result) you should get a blood test asap.
You need to take this in the stride of that you didn't screw up. She did. She took a chance and got caught red-handed. Her cheating on you is NEVER healthy for a long-term relationship. Stop thinking with your schlong and think with your noggin. And get tested for STDs while you're at it. You don't deserve to get used and abused like this. You deserve better.
What does your therapist suggest you do when you are “unable to stop” and spiralling into a PTSD episode? What grounding techniques have they suggested you try and what safety mechanisms do you have for feeling secure in this situation?
My partner has repeatedly threatened to leave me when we get into a big fight…. probably 5 times in the last 6 months.
That is pretty toxic, if their immediate threat in an argument is to leave you. Do you two have a couples' counsellor that you are working with on communication and arguments?
How can I create a path forward together with this person if I know I will make a mistake crossing their important boundary at least on rare occasions?
No one is perfect and no one communicates perfectly at all times. Yes, you need to respect the “stop” but your partner needs to respect how very hot you try and that to threaten to leave you five times in six months is pretty toxic, and I would argue, manipulative, since it seems they are trying to manage your behaviours with threats. Not OK.
Didn’t you do the same thing? You were told by your team leader not to say anything and you did as well.
Didn’t you do the same thing? You were told by your team leader not to say anything and you did as well.
You’re 26 what are you doing with your life?
It’s really vast majority?! I’m so ignorant of this statistic. I read my porn anyway but will absolutely make sure not to visit the free video sites ever again. It breaks my heart to learn this.
Ah yes, because one should expect to be disrespected by their partner not once, but twice, and accept it. Fuck out of here with you “anything goes because it’s just dancing” bullshit lmao
I think the marked difference people are saying the tipping point is lies between without physical materials(photos) thinking of IRL folks/friends you may have a crush on in a completely open manner and having literal photos used of someone that never consented to them being used like that and the act itself being done in a secretive manner. Even the act of it being conducted discreetly would let me know that the person who is doing it didn't even themselves believe their thoughts/actions to be something to be done without shame or guilt. ?? Idk, maybe I'm thinking too deeply about it ? but that would be my thoughts!!
When it comes to actual sex acts, there is not really any “normal”. I'm sure some people give/receive oral sex every day if that's what works for them! What is most definitely NOT normal is how he is pressuring you and guilt-tripping you into doing something you don't want to do. He is manipulative and coercive, that's not okay
My cousin had her last at 45. It's riskier, sure but it can definitely happen.