yeah i also want to keep it at fwb but even so i feel like i should be treated better maybe? idk, and yes i have but every time i ask if he's free he just assures me he will let me know when he is free, but then never does, i don't want to overstep because i get it, its fwb it's not a relationship, i don't want to bother him all the time asking if he's free
I’m a student, can’t always afford to fund my friends nights out as well as my own. I’ve done that for 4 years with them now, and I was happy to do it until they started making plans without me. Why I’ve came here is because doing that doesn’t seem to be enough, and I’m lost on what else I can try!
or if we will ever get back to how we were before all of this happened
But there's just the time where you didn't know that the affair was happening, there isn't a time where he wasn't cheating you. The fisical aspect didn't happened before because the other woman wasn't interested.
Break up isn't a wrong choice. If you want to stay however, it may be difficult to repair your relationship.
I think it would be best, if she given you access to her messages/accounts, not so that you would supervise her, but so that when insecurity inevitably erupts in you, you can occasiobaly go through her messages/accounts. This needs to be combined with agreement to never delete any messages. This is not negotiable, refusal shpuld mean break up.
She also shouldn't just block her ex. She should tell him she is sorry, but does not want to talk to him anymore as she is in relationship, and only then block him for good.
Secondly you need to get to the bottom of why she has done it. If the only thing she can offer you are excuses, then there is no hope for you. If she can give her reasoning, as ashamed as she may be of it, then there may be a way to work on this.
Oh, lastly she needs to understand it might potentially years to fully get over this, and she needs to be considerate of your concerns when you feel insecure, ( for example over relations with some new male “friends” in the future).
You just do your best to move on, absolutely don't try to pursue anything with him
yeah i also want to keep it at fwb but even so i feel like i should be treated better maybe? idk, and yes i have but every time i ask if he's free he just assures me he will let me know when he is free, but then never does, i don't want to overstep because i get it, its fwb it's not a relationship, i don't want to bother him all the time asking if he's free
I’m a student, can’t always afford to fund my friends nights out as well as my own. I’ve done that for 4 years with them now, and I was happy to do it until they started making plans without me. Why I’ve came here is because doing that doesn’t seem to be enough, and I’m lost on what else I can try!
or if we will ever get back to how we were before all of this happened
But there's just the time where you didn't know that the affair was happening, there isn't a time where he wasn't cheating you. The fisical aspect didn't happened before because the other woman wasn't interested.
Break up isn't a wrong choice. If you want to stay however, it may be difficult to repair your relationship.
I think it would be best, if she given you access to her messages/accounts, not so that you would supervise her, but so that when insecurity inevitably erupts in you, you can occasiobaly go through her messages/accounts. This needs to be combined with agreement to never delete any messages. This is not negotiable, refusal shpuld mean break up.
She also shouldn't just block her ex. She should tell him she is sorry, but does not want to talk to him anymore as she is in relationship, and only then block him for good.
Secondly you need to get to the bottom of why she has done it. If the only thing she can offer you are excuses, then there is no hope for you. If she can give her reasoning, as ashamed as she may be of it, then there may be a way to work on this.
Oh, lastly she needs to understand it might potentially years to fully get over this, and she needs to be considerate of your concerns when you feel insecure, ( for example over relations with some new male “friends” in the future).