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Date: October 16, 2022
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“NEWS: So, I confronted her. She said that she just needed a bit of time to recover after the fact that her ex texted her after all he's have done to her”
Do you understand what this means? She is testing the waters with her ex, you are the second option now.
I don’t but it would make me feel better frfr, ima pray about it
So…. I wouldn’t cancel until shortly before either. There have been plenty of times I felt like crap one day and better the next.
I know you got mad when someone said this wasn’t a big issue, but honestly? It doesn’t seem huge from what you described here. She doesn’t cancel till the last minute. She wants to think you’ll recover quickly. That’s it. That isn’t her not wanting you to rest or not wanting you to recover in peace, unless you left something out? You seem to take these comments as guilt trips but that could be more your response than her words.
You say you feel like you need to prove that you’re sick, but I can’t tell why. What is she saying that makes you feel that way?
Be blunt. Be honest. Tell him exactly how you feel. Ex fora reason baby.
So you forced this man to stay with you by using keeping his child despite it only being a few dates. Now you're complaining that he's too busy with work and doesn't help enough and he doesn't feel the same after you forced him to have a child with you…
You're both actual idiots, he should have wrapped up, and you should have taken the pill. And you can't force someone to compromise by holding them hostage by having their kid. This is such toxic behaviour.
Hey, I’ve been married to the man I started dating when I was 19 for 28 years now. Same age gap. He had also been my boss for the preceding year.
I do understand how many red flags strangers would see in that statement, but he has never treated me with anything other than immense love, courtesy and respect, has cared for me through horrific illness, has given me every opportunity to grow and has been the most amazing life partner I could ever have imagined.
What I’m trying to say is that only YOU know whether this relationship is healthy and happy. You’re smart enough to be on the lookout for anything that raises suspicion, just don’t let oxytocin blind you to potential issues. Name them early and talk about them. Good luck ❤️
Yes I agree. I was going to reach out. Tell her I hope she is doing great. Felt bad that we lost touch. Want to reconnect.
Yea but now you have someone who has waited 3 years and is harassing you for sex. That's a whole other red flag. Could you imagine touching someone or coercing someone to have sex w you? And then making THEM feel bad about it? I mean, if he wants sex Uber frequently when you are married, he will coerce you for it Now you know that I've been w a lot of men. 41F divorced. Probably 20+ sexual partners. There are those who coerce and there are those who won't. I will never again be with someone who coerces or makes me feel bad or tries to make me feel guilty if I don't want it right now. This is a MAJOR issue that is deep in his personality. You know that, right?
There’s a line between being principled and honoring your values, and setting yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.
OP’s gf is a poor partner, and frankly sounds abusive. No one should have values that mean they tolerate abuse for the well-being of their abuser, especially when those efforts will be completely unappreciated.
It’s self-destructive moral masturbation, not living a principled life.