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1. I'm sorry but even if they did, how would that redeem them?

   let me tell you a short story.

   I was a huge peice of shit, I was controlling, jealous, bitter, talked down to her, cruel with my words and genuinely a pretty terrible person. I did everything but physically harm her.

   and she was my equal in every way plus physical, she would taunt me, scratch me, and call me on the phone will she was cheating on me (something I only found out much later). then she left.

   neither of us had grown, neither of us had changed, all we had left were scars and pain and a seriously bad way of life now separate finally.

   I don't know how she is now, or where and that's for the best.

   but me, it's been over ten years and I pulled my shit together, I met a fantastic woman over 8 years ago, and while it wasn't her responsibility or something I even asked her to do, she healed me, over a long time with many bad days. but even before we were together I had learned how to not be a giant asshole.

   I'm not jelous anymore, we do a lot of things separately and we discuss a lot of what we want together, I'm a much healthier and calmer person, with a lot of regrets.

   and she's the mother of my son.

   so no, I don't feel redeemed nor did I save any relationship I was in that I was abusive in. I did what I did and Il have to online with it. but I get to be a better person now regardless. and I get to enjoy being that better person with my family.

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2. We do that stuff anyway. I've decided not to bother

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3. Op just be attentive

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4. I know it does. I just feel for my kids man. I wanted them to grow up in a normal not broken household. Maybe she will find out that she never wanted to be a mom in the first place and let me keep my kids and I can find them a new mom.

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5. And you agreed to marry him why?

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