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  1. This is what drives me crazy with this subreddit.

    Some of the worst advice is highly upvoted because of the drama or getting even/revenge aspect to it.

    You want that judge looking at the case favorably, or impartially, for you, not against you.

  2. OP. Listen to your gut. It never steers you wrong. It may not seem logical right now, but hindsight is 2020.

    I'm sorry youre going thru this. My inbox is always open if you need advice or someone to vent to thats not biased. Best wishes

  3. If he was so clueless about the her inappropriate behaviour, why did he hide the phone from you and then snatched it from your hands? You have to look at the situation objectively. He is lying to you. He knew her intentions all along and was entertaining them. He was having an emotional affair with her. If he was as clueless as he claims, he would have handed his phone without panicking. I know it hurts a lot because you truly love this person but he loved you enough, he wouldn't have done this to you. Don't tolerate such blatant disrespect. Break up with him.

  4. His logic is twisted and antiquated. Names are not sacred, relationships are. He has shown what is important to him, so he can live with that choice. It's his loss more than anyone else's.

  5. Did i……..ever say that? I never said ANYTHING like that. I am here asking for advice on how much misdirected anger and resentment at me I should endure.

  6. Sounds like she’s not taking you seriously because you tolerate this behavior.

    Maybe try a trial separation. She may realize how she was being unfair or she may (and you may) realize that you are better off apart.

    Either way, you shouldn’t put up with this.

  7. 19 year olds are morons still heavily influenced by the world they grew up in as a child. Is she racist now? If she is then obviously that’s a huge problem and you would be absolutely justified in leaving the relationship. If she’s not racist anymore then she grew up and saw the error of her previous beliefs and breaking up with her would be punishing her for growing as a person.

  8. I don't know who told you that you're supposed to be ok with this (but I can guess!), but you aren't.

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