Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
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We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles use the following formatting:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two. Here is an example:
They've been friends for 9 years, you've been together a month. She's not terrible for just jumping on your side , she hasn't been with you that long. Confusion is understandable.
You could just end it if you need an immediate answer. Or you could be brave and ride it out for a week and see how she goes. If the other option is end it then you've got nothing to lose anyway.
Her decision will also be based on how well you handle this.
Unless you want to break up for sure, save it for later. Sabotaging his vacation with relationship anxiety/problems is a definite red flag that can be avoided. If you felt tense leading up to the vacation, you definitely should spoken up then. Issuing a need to talk while he is both out of the country and on vacation and not face to face with you is detrimental to you both.
Here’s the thing OP, you’ve been together five years, you’ve repeatedly told her you get anxiety (aka the enjoyment is severely decreased) in event spaces and you gave her other options before your birthday.
What you need to talk to her about is why she gave you this gift.
If you want to do so lovingly: “hey gf, can we talk about the birthday gift you gave me? While I love (band), I kinda don’t understand why you thought I would enjoy it? You know that I only go to concerts because I want to spend time with you, but it’s not something that I enjoy even when I would otherwise like the event. I thought you knew this, and so this felt more like a gift for you than for me. Can you tell me what you were envisioning when you gave it to me?”
The way I would do it: “gf why would you pick a concert as a gift for me? You know I hate concerts, and it doesn’t matter who’s playing. You basically gifted me anxiety. Why?”
Yes. I was the “third” and joined a couple friend of mine. We discussed before hand what we were/weren’t comfortable with, and afterwards I thought it was fine. My friend (wife) let me know the next week after completely ghosting me that seeing me w her husband made her “feel ill” and that they weren’t speaking either, and that she needed a break from our friendship. Lol we honestly haven’t spoken since and she deleted me on fb. I know they’re still married but from what I’ve heard from mutual friends it caused a MAJOR rift. I felt awful. I know at least 2 other couples who have had similar, very negative experiences with 3somes as well. I will neverrrrr partake again ?
Very good question. For last year and a half I tried to solve relationships issues and it was nude … did not go anywhere. Focusing on that topic I lost track of money and my partner does not understand that finances in Canada is quite complicated thing. So I’m taking under control what I can and be on top of finances gives me sense of safety
“Here sign these divorce papers. Find someone else to take you to Paris”
Hm. Great insight and I will take it to heart. Thank you!
Hello /u/Revolutionary-Fold90,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles use the following formatting:
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[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
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They've been friends for 9 years, you've been together a month. She's not terrible for just jumping on your side , she hasn't been with you that long. Confusion is understandable.
You could just end it if you need an immediate answer. Or you could be brave and ride it out for a week and see how she goes. If the other option is end it then you've got nothing to lose anyway.
Her decision will also be based on how well you handle this.
Unless you want to break up for sure, save it for later. Sabotaging his vacation with relationship anxiety/problems is a definite red flag that can be avoided. If you felt tense leading up to the vacation, you definitely should spoken up then. Issuing a need to talk while he is both out of the country and on vacation and not face to face with you is detrimental to you both.
She not my girl. Just please read the full thing
Good luck with this chick as your wife. She sounds like the typical entitled wife who raises AH kids who are just as entitled.
Peace be with you! You seem like you need it if you stay with this ungrateful girl.
Here’s the thing OP, you’ve been together five years, you’ve repeatedly told her you get anxiety (aka the enjoyment is severely decreased) in event spaces and you gave her other options before your birthday.
What you need to talk to her about is why she gave you this gift.
If you want to do so lovingly: “hey gf, can we talk about the birthday gift you gave me? While I love (band), I kinda don’t understand why you thought I would enjoy it? You know that I only go to concerts because I want to spend time with you, but it’s not something that I enjoy even when I would otherwise like the event. I thought you knew this, and so this felt more like a gift for you than for me. Can you tell me what you were envisioning when you gave it to me?”
The way I would do it: “gf why would you pick a concert as a gift for me? You know I hate concerts, and it doesn’t matter who’s playing. You basically gifted me anxiety. Why?”
Yes. I was the “third” and joined a couple friend of mine. We discussed before hand what we were/weren’t comfortable with, and afterwards I thought it was fine. My friend (wife) let me know the next week after completely ghosting me that seeing me w her husband made her “feel ill” and that they weren’t speaking either, and that she needed a break from our friendship. Lol we honestly haven’t spoken since and she deleted me on fb. I know they’re still married but from what I’ve heard from mutual friends it caused a MAJOR rift. I felt awful. I know at least 2 other couples who have had similar, very negative experiences with 3somes as well. I will neverrrrr partake again ?
Yes. She’d never seen the note before. She has no idea where it came from. It did not fall out of her pocket.
Theft, quite simple. She pays you back in full and dump her.
Very good question. For last year and a half I tried to solve relationships issues and it was nude … did not go anywhere. Focusing on that topic I lost track of money and my partner does not understand that finances in Canada is quite complicated thing. So I’m taking under control what I can and be on top of finances gives me sense of safety
I talk to his mom a lot, also while they visited my alarm went off to take it.