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naty19, 84 y.o.
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Date: October 4, 2022
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I mean the fact is, sexual compatibility is important. We can pretend it isn't, but it is. You have every right to decide you now want to wait until marriage, and that's VALID. But on the other side of that, he's allowed to decide he doesn't want to give up sex to continue to be with you, and that's valid too because if that's the route you choose to go, there will no longer be sexual compatibility. You should BOTH do what makes you happiest.
You’re not really on good terms with her bff. There’s no mutual hostility I guess, but you never/rarely speak. That’s at best on the positive side of neutral. Right now she’s helping your ex manipulate you, which is at best on the negative side of neutral.
It sounds like your ex wants to goad you into showing interest again, without making it obvious to you (or to someone else?) that she’s doing so. She unblocked her insta to give you a way to reach out, but if you told her “knock it off” she’d pretend to be innocent and claim her bff was doing all of that on her own. Maybe she wants you back. Maybe she wants the ego boost of having your attention again. Mute or block both of them, whichever option lets you ignore them indefinitely.
Nothing good comes from coke. It’s just a bad scene. Add the possibility of fentanyl getting in it….you BF cares about you.
Yuck, big yikes. Be a better man
Let it go.
He’s on a power trip and that name now belongs to her too, it’s a hassle to change and she doesn’t like her maiden name.
If she wants to fight that clause in the divorce and keep it then it has nothing to do with you.
he's a jerk. this isn't going to stop, it's only going to get worse
New rules- Dua lipa
You’re not telling your friends because you know it’s not in your best interest and you don’t want to hear it. You don’t want to put your friends through emotionally supporting you again. You recognise that they want you to be emotionally healthy and they would choose that for you, but you’re not able to choose that for yourself right now.
Not saying stop or keep going that’s a decision you have to make.
Yeah it would suck if you chose not to and it would be painful but I (and obviously your friends) think you are strong enough to get through it.
Thats abusive and her behavior would likely escalate
RUN, like your feet are on fire, get her to write out in a text to you that she would never claim rape then proceed to dump her and block her in every possible way!
And if she does try and pull BS you have a text from her in her own words to show the police.
Dump the weirdo
I’m just gonna tell you right now, from the outside, looking in, she may be cheating on you already. Generally, when reading through stories, like this, what ends up happening is that those partners asking for it have other sexual partners in line already.
I won’t be able to tell if your girlfriend is cheating or not, but you got to figure that out. Also, if she’s asking for it, there’s probably some underlying problems with your sex life right now. It may be that she’s not satisfied, I don’t know. That’s up to you to figure
Good luck buddy
You're being downvoted for your tone I think, but you're not wrong.
Leave, now. Your bf sounds like a rare piece of work. He already accused you of pedophilia for literally no reason other than he's insecure and feels jealous of a 14 year old child.
My biggest concern here is.. you stay, and a while later he breaks up with you, and starts telling everyone he knows that he left because you were a pedophile.
He can do serious damage to your personal/public image, career, and social connections.
We have no idea of the circumstances under which the book was purchased or even if it was actually purchased. If it was some kind of gift exchange, like happens in my office fairly regularly and a thing he knew about her is she likes historical romance, its just a thoughtful gift exchange. I've put a lot of thought into gift exchange gifts for people I didn't even get on with in the office just because I think if you're going to participate in those events, the least you can do is do so properly.
It's also entirely possible that they were talking about books and he mentioned that one and she thought it sounded interesting, so he actually gave her the copy he'd read and already owned. Or that she mentioned some that sounded like it and he thought it would be right up her alley.
And yes, it's possible that it was a gift with seductive intention behind it, but there's nothing inherently wrong with gifting someone you're not interested in a romance novel.