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Nika, ♥, 18 y.o.
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Nika, ♥
Date: October 31, 2022
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Dating for 5 months and already married ?
People hook up without having it meaning anything, just for pleasure. Nothing wrong with it + its completely irrelevant to the situation because this is not the problem you have with her sleeping with other people before you.
You are jealous and angry she got to experience something you didn't get to experience, given the opportunity you would have done the same. Being angry at her for it makes absolutely no sense and if you were a well adjusted person you would see that.
Your first time not being “special” also has nothing to do with your wife having had other partners. Would the only option of your first time be special if you slept with a virgin? that also means that if you divorce and find the virgin you are looking for that her first time will never be special since you've been with someone else, the whole premise doesn't make sense. What makes it special is the person that you are with not the number of times either one of you had sex.
I'm not being nude on you just to be nude on you, but you need help, you are not mature enough for a relationship, definitely not mature enough for marriage. YOU need therapy, YOU need to become better for yourself, for your current wife / or future partners you may have.
I wouldn’t say anyone was “luxuriating in their judgment” to be honest it just seems like you’re reading to much into it and making an assumption about the views of said person based off a single comment
Like it could be deeper but given the intentional caution the commenter used in wording what they said to avoid misunderstanding tells me it most likely isn’t
But he always tells me he wants me to have “his kids” and he can’t wait to marry me and whatever and I agree so idk why he wouldn’t say “ours”
25 years old is when the cerebral cortex is fully developed. 23 year old Sis here is close but has some growing up to do in multiple ways.
God, what a lose your boyfriend is.
She should talk to her doctor about it. I’m not sure what the risks are.
My boyfriend and I are both home during parts of the workday and don’t have this problem, as I’m sure is the case with most mature adults.
Don't let anyone shame you for making the best life decisions for you and the then-fetus. You did the absolute best thing you could've done in that situation.
He doesn't think about anyone but himself. He doesn't think about what it would've been like for you. He doesn't think about what a potential baby would have had to go through.
If he brings this up all the time now, it's not going to get better. You've only been together for 4 months, and I get it's hot to give up on a relationship. But it's for the best. You're not going to be happy with this man a few years from now.
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What do you do for work that’s leaving you so tired?
The unfortunate truth about being a man is that we have that expectation to have the energy to do what we need to do at any given moment. As you get older, there’s less and less opportunities to decompress, you start to focus more and more on work, housework, errands, children when you have them, aging also demands more from your fitness, and you still need to put effort into your relationship if you don’t want it to deteriorate.
Not to sound bleak but you may need to work on learning to balance things better, if you’re job is wearing you out too much to the point you can’t do your hobbies after, it might be a good idea to switch jobs that might not be so demanding. Ultimately in the grand scheme of things, hobbies should come last, you can keep a small amount of time dedicated to them, I’m sure you can tell your partner “I’ll see you at X:00, There’s a game I’ve been wanting to play all week or a song I’m trying to learn and I’ll make it up to you on a date”
You can find hobbies you enjoy with her or work on feeling less awkward with her around. My now wife used to watch YouTube on my bed while I recorded songs, I’d only do it for like 30 minutes but just the company was enough, we took up painting together and would do that once a week.
What he needs to do is end it, and explain why. He needs to have a regular conversation with her. Where he gives his reasons.
And the question is did he or did he not encourage emotional attachment to himself with the responsibilities that that entails? Also don't we have some kind of responsibility to understand that right now in our society, people just aren't good at processing information well.
We don't need to expect him to be perfect to tell him that he missed the mark. We need to uphold the standards, simply for the reason that if we give in to how crappy things are, that will be the new bare minimum. We need to make sure we're making less concessions than we are of reinforcing the actual standards. And the standards just tie into respect honor and kindness. And when we make it okay to lower those standards, we encourage things to get worse. And if your outlook isn't already rosy then if you want to change how things are in society you're going to need to tighten the standards even more.
Honestly, switch places for a week. That’s the max I give you. Let your wife go to work and go to the gym after and come home, hang out a couple of hours with her kids, then have uninterrupted time to do some more work. While you, on the flip side, are spending day in and day out with your mother in law and your mother under the same room unable to get a breather because regardless …someone is always in the house, having to feed the kids “your” milk because that’s what they prefer, having to have the patience with two old women who are definitely born in another generation, constantly being depressed, and on top of that there’s probably some lingering guilt for having those kids when she wanted them and seeing how nude it is now when she’s the one stuck at home. Try doing that for a week then please come back and let’s talk. I’d love to see how much of a martyr you blame yourself to be. You’re entitled. You’re living the dream parent life. She’s not. Get your shit together
They’re the same thing to me.
He pretty much said exactly that.
Have you talked to him about feeling this way? Not everyone is naturally a gift giver and he may not realize this is important to you.
I don't know if your husband will ever change, but it is apparent that y'all are not compatible. This van life shit in my opinion has gone way too far. I absolutely would not online in a van and move from place to place especially not with a baby. I think you've been a good wife and have done way too much honestly. He wasn't raised to be a naked working and responsible adult it seems, so everything will continue to fall on you while he hops from place to place and let's you do all the chores.
Hopefully this is a joke.
It’s not a life long dream if you don’t have the strength to buy something affordable you want.
This is a really rough spot to be in, I'm so sorry. You are definitely NTA. You have to live! your truth, you can't make yourself miserable to make things easier on your husband, he's an adult man and is responsible for doing that for himself.
That said, Your husband is def TA, he should not be using his father's illness to excuse abusing you. I think you are smart to listen to your heart on this one.
All the best to you as you move forward
Struggling to overcome sexual trauma doesn't come with an age limit. The only determinant as to whether (and how soon) one overcomes it is the quality of their therapist and the amount of work they're willing to put into recovery. This 29M is a cad of course and you don't need him in your life. But if you're assuming your trauma is just going to go away with age and without professional intervention you're probably wrong. Prioritize your emotional health and start working with a counselor who has expertise in this area. Worry about guys later once you're able to function normally. This way your past never has to be an issue in the relationship.
Right? My grandma helped me get my prescriptions and dropped me off at home after and I lived alone. I took a nap and after that, I was good to go. Everything I had to do was something I specifically needed to do, like brush my own teeth, gargle the special mouth wash, take my pills as needed, etc. i set it up so I’d be ok. I had soft foods easily available. And to be fair, my removal was not easy, 2 of my wisdom teeth were decayed and infected (so much fun) but I honestly could’ve gone to work the day after, I just figured since I took the time off, I’ll take the time off. She’s being very very extreme.
I don't mean to imply you are not a good friend, or that she doesn't genuinely care for you, or anything like that. I was just speculating on her emotional (maybe unrecognized) motivations.
If it rings true, you can still be friends and carry on, at the same time not taking it personally and recognizing “well this is how Friend is.”
Definitely it helps, thank you
Cut her off, block her everywhere. You do realize that she is going around telling people that your dad peeped on her? Other people already knew the story…
At the same time, they've already discussed this and they're only a couple of years away from having kids…if they were both honest about what they wanted.
OP needs to determine if the child is more important than the relationship.
Also, his behaviour would give me pause. Does he actually want a baby in a few years?
If you can’t talk about this, you aren’t ready for a relationship. Seriously. It hurts my feelings when you put on your headphones. Giving up something you love instead of talking isn’t good. Tell her what you just told all of us.
It helps
Naw go buy a sports bike and thank me later.